Take Me Home to My Heart
by LallyintheSky
Summary: After Regionals, Rachel Berry vowed she would never look at Jesse St. James again. But two weeks later, Rachel is met with some unexpected and life-altering news. Can she convince Jesse and herself that it's not too late?
1. Once Was Love

"Your 2010 Midwest Regional Show Choir Champions...

Vocal Adrenaline."

Her heart had shattered the second that Ms. Sylvester's mouth formed a V. They had lost. They had given everything, yet somehow they had still lost. Jesse smirked at her; he had gotten exactly what he wanted, he had won. Rachel closed her eyes and looked away, it was still too painful to look into those emerald eyes of his. She had rushed away the moment they were dismissed; given him no chance to shove his victory in her face or say something that would cause her to go running back into his arms.

_I love you. _

She had felt nothing when Finn told her he loved her. No spark, no butterflies. She instantly saw Jesse's face, but she pushed it from her mind immediately.

_I loved you. _

God, how it killed her to hear the past tense. What had she done wrong? He had forgiven her for "Run Joey Run." He'd come back to her with open arms; told her he would never leave again, never miss her drama. Why had he broken her heart?

She remembered the sick to her stomach feeling she'd had every day before she went to school after the day Jesse broke her. She remembered vomiting in the bathroom at Regionals seconds after Vocal Adrenaline's showstopping performance and just before her teammates returned for the results.

Was it true that he had no feelings? That nothing inevitably did matter to him? She wished she could believe it. But the eyes, those eyes he had given her just before he smashed the egg on her head, just as he had raised the trophy in the air…those looks couldn't have meant nothing.

"Rachel?"

She snapped out of her reverie. The Glee club was sitting in Mr. Schuester's living room, having a meeting to decide what to do now that Glee club was on hiatus. Though they had performed "To Sir, With Love" that afternoon, everyone looked miserable, so Rachel's watering eyes weren't out of place.

"Hmm?" Rachel responded meekly, wiping tears from the corner of her eyes.

"Are you okay?" Rachel sniffed and smiled weakly.

"I'll be okay Mr. Shue. It's just…hard." She began to weep again. Mercedes looked at her sympathetically, while Kurt put a hand on her shoulder—one of the few nice gestures he'd ever shown towards her. Suddenly and violently, Rachel felt her stomach churn, and the same sickly feeling return. She had no time to excuse herself, no time to give a warning before she hurried into the bathroom and flung her head over the toilet bowl. She sat there for a whole two minutes, tears leaking from her eyes and running down her cheeks. Mr. Schuester stood outside the door, knocking softly.

"Rachel? Is everything okay?"

"I'm fine!" Rachel squeaked, examining the remnants of her bean burrito swirling around in the bowl as she flushed. Will looked after her for a moment before turning back to the rest of the club.

"What's that about?" Puck questioned. Shue shook his head.

"Not sure." Rachel bounded out of the bathroom, putting on her best showface.

"I'm fine. I must have simply eaten something that caused me to feel ill. Nothing to worry about, right? We're here about Glee, so that's what we're going to discuss." She flashed a smile to the rest of the club. Quinn's eyes lingered on her for a few moments, while Finn handed her a glass of water.

After a heated discussion, they came to the conclusion that, school sponsored or no, Glee would continue. If they had to, they would hold rehearsals in Will's apartment, but the club would not be disbanded, even it was on paper.

That night, Rachel stared at the ceiling, unable to find sleep despite how hard she tried. Her mind kept floating back to another time, a time when she and Jesse lied on the very same bed. He had told her he loved her, that he would never hurt her; that she was all he wanted. When did the lies stop? Had he ever cared about her, or had it all been a farce, all been a fantasy that she'd concocted in her mind?

"Are you sure you're ready?" Jesse ran a hand lovingly up her thigh. Rachel closed her eyes for a moment before answering.

"Yes. I love you Jesse." Jesse laughed and kissed her nose tenderly.

"I love you, Rachel Berry. My shining star." He began to kiss her neck, and she tensed. "I would never hurt you."

They laid, wrapped up in blankets and sheets. She faced away from him, but his arm held her bare shoulder softly. He leaned over to whisper in her ear, but she spoke before he could.

"Was I okay?" He laughed and spun her towards him.

"Rachel, you were more than okay. You were wonderful. How could you even ask such a thing?"

"And you really love me?"

"Of course. More than ever."

Rachel's eyes snapped open. Any brief sleep she may have been getting was shot from her mind, replaced with a terrifying realization. She sprung from the bed and glanced at the calendar tacked to her bulletin board. She was hit with another terrifying blow when her suspicions were correct—she was late. She had been so overwhelmed with Regionals and Glee and Jesse and Heartbreak that she hadn't even been paying attention to her period schedule, and now here it was, plain as day: she should have started two weeks ago.

Head in her hands, she cried her heart out. If she were right, everything would change now.


	2. Such Great Heights

Rachel walked into school the next morning with bags under her eyes. She had gotten sick again that morning, and was running on a granola bar and some orange juice. She was standing at her locker when Finn approached, grinning the stupid grin that she just wanted to smack right off his face.

"Hey Rach…you look terrible." She glared at him for a few seconds before responding.

"Thank you."

"No I just mean…hey is everything okay?" He looked genuinely concerned. Poor Finn. Always so worried, and there was nothing he could do to help if her dilemma came to pass. She closed her eyes.

"I'm fine Finn. Really." She walked away from him, and he stood there at her locker, staring after her dumbfounded.

Rachel put her head down as she walked briskly down the hallway. Suddenly, Quinn rushed to catch up with her, and caught her arm.

"Rachel, can I talk to you for a second?"

"Why? So you can make fun of my broken heart?" Rachel scowled. Quinn looked at her sympathetically.

"I know. "

"What are you talking about?"

"I know what you're going through. I've been there."

Rachel looked at Quinn with wide eyes, and glanced around to see if anyone was listening.

"How do you know?"

"Last night at Mr. Schue's. It was textbook. You're just lucky the rest of the club is as dumb as a bag of rocks. Kurt actually suggested that it was because you didn't eat something vegan friendly." Quinn rolled her eyes. "Have you…taken a test yet?" Rachel shook her head. "And how late are you?" Rachel averted her eyes and said nothing. Quinn sighed. "Well, listen, if you need anything, just…let me know."

"Why are you being so nice to me?" Rachel looked at her meekly. Quinn just smiled.

"Because I know how much it sucks," she answered simply, and walked away.

Walking into Glee that day, Rachel felt as though she was carrying a thousand extra pounds. She had to know. Immediately. She would go straight to the drugstore after school, and she would find out and then…and then what? She couldn't very well tell Jesse…she couldn't tell anyone! But she had to know. The lead feeling in the pit of her stomach wouldn't go away, and she knew that even the slightest bit of dancing would send her nausea into a fit. She requested the day off, and Mr. Schue looked at her cautiously. Rachel would never miss, and to miss the first day of off-campus rehearsals? It was very uncharacteristic.

"Is everything okay Rachel?"

"Yeah, I just…I think I have a stomach bug. Nothing serious, I'm just worried that strenuous activity is going to be…a problem. I'm sure you understand." Mr. Schue nodded, and Rachel bounded for the door.

She walked into the CVS, picked up the little pink package, and walked confidently towards the checkout. The elderly woman at the register looked at her with disproval, but Rachel snatched the test from her hands and walked out the door, not even bothering with change.

She sat in her tiny bathroom, staring at the test that sat upon the sink. It was the longest three minutes of her life. Although she was almost sure of the answer, she awaited the results impatiently. When the faint, second line began to show, she couldn't hold it in any more, and she bawled like a toddler.

Confused and scared, she walked down the stairs and out into the streets of Lima. Before she knew it, she was sitting on Quinn Fabray's front porch, waiting for the blonde. When the red cavalier pulled into the driveway, Rachel stood. Quinn stepped out, looking thoroughly unaffected by her surprise visitor. Without a word, Quinn walked over and wrapped her arms around Rachel.

"It's okay. It's going to be okay," she whispered, while Rachel sobbed into her shoulder.

Rachel sat in Quinn's kitchen with a cup of tea. She had never been in the girl's home before, but it was quaint. The kitchen was very white, with oak counters and pale blue curtains on the window above the sink. Quinn sat across from Rachel at the breakfast bar and looked in her eyes.

"So what are you going to do?" Quinn spoke, breaking the silence.

"I…I honestly don't know. I can't tell Jesse, can I?"

Quinn watched Rachel for a few moments before she spoke.

"I waited a month before I told Finn," there was an awkward silence at the mention of the pretend father of Quinn's baby. "I knew by the second week, but couldn't bring it to myself to admit it, but I could only hold out four weeks." Rachel stirred her tea. "You still love him, don't you?" Quinn asked. Rachel looked up at her.

"Madly. He shattered my heart but I just keep thinking he's going to show up and the heavens will sing and we'll walk off into the sunset like Sandy and Danny." Quinn just stared at her. "Grease?" Rachel offered. Quinn's eyes widened with comprehension.

"Right. But Rachel, you have to be careful. I know what it's like—"

"Yeah, you've mentioned that," Rachel said smartly. Quinn narrowed her eyes.

"Let me finish. I know what it's like to love someone who's going to repeatedly hurt you over and over," Rachel looked away. "It isn't fun. It hurts, more than anything. And it's even worse when you're carrying around something to hold you to him. Just be careful."

Rachel looked back down at her tea, emotions swirling inside her head. Quinn took a deep breath.

"I can't do this Quinn. I can't have a baby, I'm fifteen…" she stopped suddenly, looking up at Quinn, embarrassed. Quinn just smiled and shook her head softly. "What I meant to say was I can't have _his _baby. I can barely live without him, I couldn't handle seeing his face every day and knowing I can never have him again." Quinn reached for Rachel's hand, but Rachel stood.

"I should go. I…I have to go. Thank you for the tea, Quinn," she said, and walked out of the Fabray kitchen and house. Quinn stared after her, then closed her eyes and sighed.

Rachel burst through her front door and stormed up the stairs, hot tears racing down her cheeks.

"Baby?" her father, Leroy, called after her from his home office down the hall. "Baby, is everything okay?" He knocked softly on her doorframe, and then peeked in. Rachel was facedown on the bed, sobbing into a pillow. Leroy walked in and gingerly rubbed his daughter on the back, sitting on the edge of the bed. "Oh honey, is this about Jesse?" Rachel began to sob even harder. "Your dad thinks you're so melancholy because of regionals but I know the truth. You still care about him don't you?" Rachel nodded and barely lifted her head.

"He broke my heart." Leroy played with his daughter's hair.

"I know it's hard baby. But what about that Finn boy you liked so much? I thought I heard you mention he'd been trying to court you?" Rachel sat up; her face flushed and eyes red.

"But he's not Jesse. I still care about him deeply, and I know he feels the same about me. I just know. Plus…" she lingered, debating whether to tell her father. Although she knew he would understand, she couldn't help but feel that she would be hurting him in some way. Leroy tilted his head.

"Yes babygirl?"

"Um…I'm not sure if Quinn still likes Finn," Rachel said quickly, searching for any excuse. Leroy chuckled slightly.

"When has that stopped you before?" he questioned. Rachel gave him a glare, and he sobered. "But honestly baby, if this boy, Jesse or Finn, is something you want, you should go for it. Don't let anything or anyone else get in the way of your happiness."

"But what if there's a big, big problem?"

"You'll find a way around it," Leroy said, misreading her statement. Rachel bit her lip, while Leroy stood. "How does Chinese sound?" he asked. Rachel smiled meekly and nodded. Leroy leaned down and kissed her forehead. "I love you babygirl, and whatever you decide, your father and I will be proud of you."

Rachel watched after her father as he exited the room. She heard him make the call to order food, and then heard the stereo system in the living room begin playing a familiar tune. Queen was Leroy's favorite band, and although he had been at regionals, he had no clue about Jesse's previous undertakings with the band. As the opening chords to "Another One Bites the Dust," rang up the stairwell, Rachel collapsed back onto her bed, heaving sobs.

She could still see him, plain as day, in his crisp cobalt jacket with his hair pushed back just right. She could still feel the pain and jealously she had been swamped with watching Gisele run her hands all over Jesse during the performance. Although she knew (well, hoped) it had been acting, the girl still seemed utterly taken with the stunning male lead. Although she tried to ignore them, the lyrics permeated her brain.

"_How do you think I'm gonna get along without you without you when you're gone. You took me for everything that I had and kicked me out on my own…" _she sang to herself, tears streaming down. She put a hand on her stomach, but all she could see were the looks Jesse had given her as he had exited the stage: apologetic, pained, oh-so still in love, but loyal to his team. She had to wonder if she might have done the same thing for New Directions, and it was quite possible. Jesse was a star, and she couldn't be the one to hold him back.


	3. Everyone Is Hurting Now

As she walked the hallways that day, there were rumors flooding that Mr. Schue wanted the club to meet in the choir room once more. She assumed that Figgins had caught them and they were permanently disbanded, and she thought it was a little harsh for their final goodbye to take place in the choir room. She walked in somberly, and met eyes with Quinn, who smiled at her encouragingly. She turned away and took a seat in the front row next to Artie.

"Hey. This seat taken?" Rachel looked up.

Finn Hudson. Poor Finn Hudson. Clueless to the world around him, completely unaware that two of the girls he had come to care about would be having the babies of another man. Rachel smiled at him weakly and shook her head, and he sat down.

"You okay Rach? You've actually been like, quiet lately, and you skipped rehearsal. What's up with that?"

"I haven't felt well. I think I had the flu, "Rachel explained. Finn nodded and widened his eyes slightly.

"Oh. Right. Feeling any better?"

"A bit," Rachel looked towards the door, pleading for Mr. Schuester to hurry up.

"So what's this about anyway?" Mercedes asked. "I mean Mr. Schue sounded like it was really important."

"I'm guessing Figgins found out about our little operation," Kurt suggested. "I mean it was only a matter of time."

"Yeah but I figured we'd get through more than one rehearsal," Artie sighed. Puck laughed.

"You weirdos are so clueless," he grinned. Rachel scowled at him, but she began to wonder. What _was _this about? Did Mr. Schue know? Was he going to tell the club and once again teach a lesson while hurting her? _"And this is why we don't fraternize with the enemy, kids!" _

Just then, Mr. Schuester entered, looking not nearly as miserable as she had seen him the past few days. He carried a small guitar case, which Rachel assumed was a ukulele. Why in the name of Sondheim would he have a ukulele? She furrowed her eyebrows as he brought two stools to the front of the class and sat down. They stared at one another for about 30 seconds before he finally spoke, his lips curling into a slight smile.

"We've got another year."

Everyone (except for Puck) stared at him blankly, unable to comprehend his words. They looked towards one another, a few "What"s and "How"s coming about. Mr. Schue just smiled widely at them while they realized the meaning of his words.

"C'mon, we got another year!" he exclaimed proudly. Rachel put her hands to her mouth.

"Oh my god!" she screamed, while Finn got to his feet. It was the first true joy she had felt since…well really since Regionals, but especially since finding out about the pregnancy. Everyone around her was hugging and high fiving, and she jumped to her feet and rushed to Mr. Schue, nearly tackling him with a hug.

"Mr. Schuester!"

"Whoa," he exclaimed, laughing at her enthusiasm. Completely forgetting about her situation, she turned to face the room.

"Okay, you guys, I think this is the perfect opportunity to start rehearsing for next year's sectionals immediately—" she was interrupted by Mr. Schue taking her shoulders and addressing the class, leading her to her seat.

"Guys, you've all worked really hard this year—"

"But I have ideas!" she sat, and thoughtlessly took Finn's hand in excitement.

"You deserve a break. Take the summer off, have some fun," he turned away, and then turned back. "Oh, but before you go, I have something for you," he opened the small case. "You all sang for me the other day, so, today I'd like to return the favor. Puck, if you're ready?" Everyone smirked at Puck, understanding his earlier comment, while Rachel realized Finn was staring at her and looked away from him. She tried to pull her hand away but he held on tight, and she caved. The duet began the opening chords to "Over the Rainbow," and Rachel's heart sank, remembering her dad's singing this to her as a child and remembering the baby.

Still holding Finn's hand, she looked at him guiltily. He offered his shoulder to her, and she took it, fully aware she was sending the wrong signals. She watched the pair sing and lifted her head as Finn turned to look back at Quinn. Rachel assumed he was offering some sort of apology, some signal of peace, and Quinn smiled back at him sympathetically; she was keeping yet another secret from him. She quickly averted her gaze back towards the performers.

Rachel caught Puck smiling at Quinn, and she turned to grin at the blonde, and then remembering her words from the night before, turned back away. Finn offered his shoulder again, more persistently this time, and with a guilty conscience, Rachel took it once again. She had tears in her eyes, but she kept her gaze fixed on Mr. Schuester.

As the pair brought the song to a close, everyone's eyes were filled with tears. The students rose from their plastic chairs and surrounded Mr. Schue, giving him the biggest hug they could muster. He told them they were free to go, and Finn turned to Rachel.

"Can I walk you to class?" he offered his arm, grinning. She looked at him, her heart breaking, but she attempted her best showface.

"I…I want to stay and talk to Mr. Schue," she excused. Finn looked slightly dejected, but nodded.

"Okay. Wanna do something this weekend?" he offered. She closed her eyes for half a second.

"I'll…I have to check. I'll let you know, Finn," she smiled. He glanced at her and shrugged.

"Okay. See you later then?"

"Of course," she smiled politely as he left the choir room. Quinn approached behind her.

"You can't do this to him," she said. Rachel scowled.

"But I can't hurt him either…"

"I was you. Scared, hating myself," she spoke at barely above a whisper, but Rachel heard every word clear as day.

"Jesse was my will to live."

"But I realized, if I'm so willing to take care of this baby, why am I not willing to do it for myself?" she said. Rachel began to tear again, and took a Kleenex from the box on the shelf. Quinn made for the exit.

"Just remember, Rachel. It will be okay. I'm proof of that," she smiled, and walked out the classroom door. Rachel collapsed back into a chair and blew her nose. She heard a noise, and her head snapped up.

"Mr. Schue!"

"Hey Rachel…I thought you'd take Glee being back as good news," Mr. Schue said, sitting next to her. Rachel laughed quietly.

"I do. I just…" Looking into Mr. Schuester's eyes, she swallowed hard. "Mr. Schue, I'm pregnant."

Mr. Schuester looked at Rachel with wide eyes. "Rachel, did you tell Finn?"

Rachel blinked a few times and looked at him stupidly. "Finn?"

"Well if he's the father he has a right…to…oh no," Mr. Schuester's eyes bulged. Rachel closed her eyes. "Jesse?" Rachel nodded.

"He doesn't know," she whispered. Mr. Schue put a fist to his mouth.

"Rachel…are you going to—"

"I'm keeping it," she said defiantly. "I might give it away for adoption but I'm not going to terminate it," she said. Mr. Schuester nodded.

"And this might be a longshot, but have you talked to Jesse?" Rachel shook her head.

"I couldn't even look at him. I just keep seeing the faces that he gave me when I broke _his _heart. How could I even face him after all this?" she asked. Mr. Schue searched for an answer but came up empty. Speechless, he stood.

"Just…be careful Rachel," he said, leaving the brunette alone and confused in her chair.

The following afternoon, she sat in her living room with her dads and Quinn. Her fathers were quite perplexed—the only times she had ever mentioned the blonde was to express her hatred or to criticize the teen's unplanned pregnancy, and now she was sitting in an armchair as though she had belonged there all the while.

"Dad, daddy. I asked for you to come into the living room to discuss something severely important."

"Muffin, we told you, of course you're going to get into Julliard," Hiram smiled. Leroy frowned at his husband and turned to his daughter.

"Go on, baby."

"Dad, Daddy…" she turned to Quinn in fear. Quinn smiled encouragingly and nodded her on. "Do you remember the situation my…Quinn found herself in this last year?"

"Quinn, darling, if you need someplace to stay there's no need for all the formalities," Hiram frowned. Leroy rolled his eyes.

"Rachel, what's going on?" he asked. She closed her eyes.

"I'm pregnant."

"_What?"_ Hiram cried, while Leroy stood silently and walked to his daughter, enveloping her in a tight hug.

"Oh baby. Is that what you were trying to tell me the other day?" he asked. She nodded into his shoulder.

"Who is the father, Rachel?" Hiram asked from the couch. She wiped her nose and looked at him.

"Jesse," she confessed.

"Oh fantastic," Hiram said, walking off into the kitchen. Rachel stared after him, while Leroy shook his head.

"He'll be fine, just give him a little while to cool down. Oh babygirl, what are you going to do?"

"I'm going to keep it."

"She can always give it up for adoption like I did," Quinn chimed in. Rachel nodded, while Leroy wiped the tears from his daughter's cheeks.

"Honey we're going to take care of you. How far along do you think you are?"

"I…well…she sat down on the sofa. "From Regionals it had been….4 weeks, so…almost six?" Rachel had inherited her mother's math skills, that was certain.

"Alright, well, the first order of business is get you to a doctor," Leroy said. "Quinn, can I have the name and number of your OBGYN?" he asked. Quinn smiled and followed him into the kitchen, while Rachel sat alone on the sofa.

That evening, she knocked on the front door of the Hummel-Hudson residence, rocking back and forth on her heels. Kurt answered the door and looked at her surprised.

"Rachel. What a pleasant surprise," he said sarcastically. She rolled her eyes.

"Is Finn home?" she asked. Kurt let her in and called up the stairs at the top of his lungs.

"FINN. RACHEL'S HERE." He turned and smiled at her, then descended down the stairs to his basement room. Finn came blundering down the stairs clumsily.

"Hey Rach!" he said happily. "I'm glad you're here."

"Yeah. Finn, we…I need to explain something to you." Rachel walked towards a couch, and gestured for him to sit.

"Okay, this is weird. What's going on?"

"Finn, I have a confession to make."

"Yeah?" he said, looking quite worried. Rachel took a deep breath, and couldn't look him in the eye.

"I'm having a baby."

There was a moment of silence, and then Finn exploded.

"Are you fricking _kidding _me? Jesse St. Jackass? Really?" he stood, flailing his arms and pushing furniture out of his way.

"Finn, please," she cried.

"No, no. This is ridiculous. How could you do this to me?"

"Finn, it was before we were…before Jesse and I broke up. It was completely reasonable, and it's not like I knew it was going to happen," she tried to console him, but he was furious.

"Rachel, I don't get it. I thought you liked me!"

"I did!" she cried. "But we were in a relationship, it's normal!" Rachel reached out for him. "Finn, please sit down. I need you right now. Especially now."

"Rachel how can I be with someone who's pregnant with the baby of my…is mortal enemy too strong of a word?"

"Finn that's what I need to talk to you about. I'm going to need someone to be there for me because I know Jesse won't be. I need you to think about how you stood by me even when Jesse and I were together and continue that. I'm going to need a shoulder to lean on, and I want it to be you."

"So I'm supposed to play best friend to the pregnant girl I'm in love with? We know I'm not good at that Rachel."

"Please. You're the only thing I have right now," Rachel begged. Finn rolled his eyes.

"Fine. Did you tell St. Jackoff yet?"

"No. He wouldn't listen even if I did tell him," Rachel shrugged. Finn scowled.

"Rachel, I am not going to let you go through this on your own—let me finish. I hate him more than I hate the Steelers, but even I wouldn't want him to live his life not knowing he had a kid."

Rachel rose to her feet.

"I've got to go. I can't do this. I'm sorry Finn…I'll…I'll see you in school," she rushed towards the front door and Finn watched after her. He flipped a kitchen chair in frustration, breaking one of the legs.

"God damnit!"


	4. My Story

She had only known for a week or so, and rumors were already in full fledge at William McKinley. The points and stares from people she didn't even know made her feel as though she were living life in a fishbowl, and her looming appointment at the baby doctor in the next few weeks loomed on the horizon like an enemy ship. Even her friends from Glee gave her wary looks, expecting some sort of explanation. She talked to Mr. Schue and arranged for the club to meet once again that Thursday.

Standing in front of her friends and classmates, Rachel detested her time in the spotlight. She gathered herself and began to address the issue that had brought them together.

"As you're all well aware, there are some things going around about me, and I would like to clarify, with you, my teammates, the truth of what is going on in the best way I can." She turned to nod to Brad, who plunked out a few innocent sounding piano notes for the introduction.

"_Whispering, hear the ghosts in the moonlight.  
Sorrow doing a new dance,  
Through their bone, through their skin," _

Tina and Mercedes were whispering to one another, while Quinn smiled and nodded encouragingly for Rachel to continue.

"_Listening to the souls in the fool's night.  
Fumbling mutely with their rude hands,  
And there's heartache without end,"_ Rachel had chosen to cut a portion of the song in order to not lose the point she was attempting to address. She made eye contact with Finn, who looked furious, but was attempting his best to stay for her performance.

"_History, little miss didn't do right.  
Went and ruined all the true plans;  
Such a shame. Such a sin.  
Mystery, home alone on a school night.  
Harvest moon over the blue land,  
Summer longing on the wind,"_ her voice began to choke, but she pushed through. She had to finish the song, she had to explain her situation to the only people who might care. She caught Mr. Schuester's eyes—they were glossy. 

"_Had a sweetheart on his knees,  
So faithful and adoring  
And he touched me, and I let him love me,  
So let that be my story._

_Listening  
For the hope, for the new life.  
Something beautiful, a new chance  
Hear its whispering, there again." _As she finished her song, Quinn, Mercedes, Tina and Kurt rose to swoop her up into a hug with tears in their eyes. Puck looked from Rachel to Finn, who was seething, arms folded in his chair.

"So wait. There are ghosts in your house?" Brittany asked. Mercedes and Kurt looked at her skeptically, while Santana giggled. Puck stood and sat next to Finn while the group was distracted.

"So what do you say we go kick some St. Jackoff ass?" he asked Finn excitedly, but Finn just shook his head.

"I promised Rachel I'd be there for her, and she hasn't told St. James yet. I can't be the one who lets it slip," he explained. Puck shrugged.

"Dude, sorry this has happened to you like, twice."

As her doctor's appointment drew closer, Rachel became more and more afraid. What if something was wrong with the baby? She had become strangely attached to the child growing within her, even if it had only been about 8 weeks. She still had no strength to even think about telling Jesse, but she knew the day would come. It would have to: Nationals was in two weeks, and soon thereafter, Jesse would be off to California never to be heard from again.

She considered calling him, but each time she brought his number up in her phone, she couldn't bring herself to press send. Her father, Hiram, had finally accepted that she was pregnant, and had apologized greatly for his reactions.

"It's just that you're my baby girl, Rachel. I hate to see you go through this," he had said. Without Glee, Rachel had been attempting to find things to occupy her time and keep her mind off the baby, but it wasn't easy. She arranged her usual summer singing and acting workshops; her instructors thrilled to have her return. Her clothes were beginning to feel tight, and she was thrilled to be receiving a few of Quinn's hand me downs. When she didn't think of Jesse, she believed it was entirely possible she could do this, but her mind would always revert back to the boy who changed her life.

She had once betrayed his trust, and she questioned whether he truly ever gotten over that. She could remember the moves to their hate-influenced ballet as though it was yesterday. Rachel tried dancing slightly around her room but found that her ankles were far too weak with the extra exhaustion of being pregnant. Frustrated and angry, she threw a pillow across her room.

"Pillow abuse isn't going to do anything, girl." Rachel spun, surprised to find Mercedes at her doorframe.

"Mercedes! What are you doing here?"

"Leroy let me in. I like him, he's nice," she entered the room, looking around. "Wow, girl, this is like a Musical Museum." Rachel laughed.

"Thanks," she cleared the laundry off her bed and suggested Mercedes sit.

"I just came over to see how you were doing," Mercedes explained, sitting down next to Rachel. Rachel shrugged and smiled weakly.

"Best as can be expected, I guess."

"Listen. We all want you to know that we have your back, just like we had Quinn's. Even Kurt said he'll be nice to you as long as you're pregnant," Mercedes laughed, and Rachel smiled.

"I'm really scared Mercedes."

"I know. But look at Quinn, she's just fine. Everything will turn out okay."

"No, I'm not scared about having the baby. I'm scared about losing Jesse," she admitted. Mercedes looked at her in surprise.

"Hold up. Did you just say you're afraid of losing _Jesse? _The guy that broke your heart?"

"I know, I know. It's stupid. But I can't help but feel like maybe he still cares about me, deep down." Mercedes took her hand.

"Honey I hate to be blunt, but keep dreaming. He sold us out, and there's a very good possibility he never cared about you—"

"That's a lie," Rachel growled. Mercedes put her hands up in defense.

"Girl, I'm not trying to hurt you. I'm trying to keep you from getting hurt."

"I'm already pretty damn hurt Mercedes! Look at me! Look at my life right now. I went from being a loser who everyone hates to being a pregnant loser who everyone feels bad for."

"Well listen. No matter what, the Glee club has your back. And whether this guy decides to be decent and accept that he's fathered a kid or not, we're going to be there for you. Even if the baby has to grow up without a father, it doesn't have to grow up without a family." Rachel smiled at Mercedes.

"Thank you Mercedes," she said. "I'm going to hug you, okay?"


	5. Truth and Consequences

The morning of her doctor's appointment, she had received a phone call from Quinn—she wasn't feeling well and didn't want to risk getting Rachel sick at the appointment. She felt terrible, but she wouldn't be able to go. Rachel panicked—her dads were both working, and she couldn't drive. Flustered, she picked up her cell and called the only person she could think of—Finn Hudson.

"Yeah?" Finn said irritably as he picked up the phone.

"Finn, I need a huge favor."

Rachel sat in the passenger's seat of his car as they drove silently to the hospital for Rachel to get her first sonogram and find out if the baby was okay. Finn flicked through radio stations, until the memorable melody of Bohemian Rhapsody echoed through the speakers. Rachel quickly reached for the stereo and changed the station before too much of the song could play and memories flood back.

"Right," Finn said. "Sorry."

"It's okay," Rachel shrugged. "I just can't hear the song, you know?"

"Yep."

He dropped her at the door while he made his way into the parking garage, then met her inside the lobby. They made their way up the elevator to the sixth floor. She approached the receptionist's desk and filled out a few forms. After the two waited for what felt like hours, a short red haired nurse finally called out her name. Rachel rose, and turned to Finn.

"Come with me," she begged. He looked apprehensive, but followed. The nurse handed Rachel a hospital gown, and Rachel hid behind a curtain and changed into the gown. By the time she made it to the bed, Dr. Woo had entered the room.

"Hello Rachel, I'm Dr. Woo, it's nice to meet you. This must be the father?" he asked. Rachel looked at Finn embarrassed.

"Er, no. This is my best friend Finn," she said.

"The father's not in the picture," Finn explained bitterly, shaking Dr. Woo's hand. The doctor nodded, and went through his routine checkup.

"Well, everything seems to be in good order, I'll have Natalie come in and do your sonogram then. It was lovely to meet you Rachel, and I'll see you again at 24 weeks," he said, exiting the room. Natalie, the short red haired nurse, took care of the sonogram, and Rachel smiled widely as she saw the very tiny makings of a baby.

"I would ask you if you want to know the gender, but it looks like this baby's a shy one!" Natalie smiled, and Rachel furrowed her brow.

"Is that unusual?" she asked the nurse, but Finn interrupted.

"Well since you and Jesse are huge drama queens, I'd say so," he hissed. Rachel scowled at him, while the nurse shook her head.

"No, not at all. We get a lot of babies that just weren't prepared for a photoshoot," she joked.

Leaving Rachel to get cleaned up, Natalie left the room to get the picture of the baby that would be printed. Rachel turned to Finn.

"It's beautiful," she said. Finn's eyes were glazed, but he shrugged nonchalantly.

"How are you going to do this Rachel? You'll never be able to juggle being a mother and being a star."

"I'll have help. Once I muster up the courage to tell Jesse, he'll help me take care of the baby," she said. Finn rolled his eyes.

"Are you delusional? You think he's gonna stick around?" Finn asked. Rachel looked at the ground.

"What do you think I should do?"

"Maybe you should ask your boyfriend. Oh wait, you can't, he's not here." Finn stood and stormed out of the office, leaving Rachel alone to clean off the sonogram goo and pick up the picture of her baby. Walking out of the hospital, she stopped outside of the lobby and looked once more at the sonogram photo. Thoughtlessly, she pulled out her cell phone and dialed Jesse's number.

"Hey, this is Jesse St. James, star of Vocal Adrenaline and 4 time winner of Regionals! I'm probably practicing for Nationals now, but leave your name, number, and a brief message, and I'll call you back, unless you suck." Rachel took a deep breath and waited for the beep.

"Jesse, hi. It's Rachel. Listen, I was hoping I could talk to you soon. It's really important. So uh, yeah. Give me a call back."

Dejected, Rachel walked out of the hospital, unsure of how she would be getting home. Finn stood from his seat at a bench and walked to her, looking apologetic.

"I'm sorry. I just get…angry sometimes. The whole situation's not fair, Rachel." Finn whined. Rachel sighed.

"I know, Finn. Believe me, I know."

When she didn't receive a call back that night, she was fully aware of what she had to do. According to Mr. Schue, Nationals were on Saturday, and that meant the team would more than likely leave that Friday. She had one more day to potentially catch Jesse at a rehearsal before his ego would grow even larger than it already was.

After school the next day, she hopped on a bus just as she had to get to Carmel High all those other times. She snuck in the front door just as she had learned to do when visiting her mother, and peeked in the auditorium. A faint echo of "Paint it Black" came through the crack in the door, Jesse shining front and center. He wore a black button down that much more suited his taste than the pink had, unbuttoned to about halfway down his chest, black dress slacks, and black dance shoes. He looked like a god among common men, while the rest of the dancers wore red shirts with black suspenders. Rachel slid through the doors and sat in the very back row, praying to be unnoticed. As the classic ended, her mother, Shelby, stood with Beth slung over her shoulder and grinned.

"Good, guys, good. 5 minute diaper change, then let's run the show one more time, from the top. Rachel slunk down in her seat. She had to wait until rehearsal was legitimately over before she tried talking to him—she couldn't risk denial in front of all of Vocal Adrenaline. She watched Shelby smile and cuddle her new baby girl, and felt a twinge of jealousy. True her fathers had loved her with twice as much adoration, but here was her own mother, replacing her with a newer, fresher model. Rachel shook the thought from her head, and smiled. She wondered if she could love her baby with as much love as Shelby loved Beth. She watched with glossy eyes as Shelby changed the infant's diaper, lifted her in the air, and kissed her. With their win at Regionals, Shelby had promised her team she would wait until Nationals to resign from Vocal Adrenaline, and was searching for a suitable replacement herself.

"Okay, from the top," she turned to put the infant in the portable bassinet she had brought to rehearsal, "Adriana, please stop rolling your eyes." A blonde girl in the front row looked shocked, then embarrassed, and Jesse turned to laugh at her. Although she couldn't personally hear it, the sound of Jesse's laugh echoed in her mind.

She watched as Jesse ran down the aisle and hid in the doorway to the auditorium. So he was stealing her tactic, hmm? Hit them from the shadows? She smirked to herself, perhaps she had taught him something.

A familiar background tune began, and Rachel's jaw dropped. Was he really so full of himself?

"_And now, the end is near.  
And so I face the final curtain.  
My friend, I'll say it clear  
I'll state my case of which I'm certain.  
I've lived a life that's full  
I traveled each and every highway.  
And more, much more than this,  
I did it my way." _ He had walked slowly down the aisle as he bellowed the words to the verse with more heart and soul than she had ever experienced from him. Rachel licked her lips and sucked in a breath.

"_Regrets, I've had a few.  
But then again, too few to mention," _he sang the line with a bitter chuckle, and Rachel's nostrils flared._  
"I did what I had to do  
And saw it through without exemption.  
I planned each charted course  
Each careful step, along the byway,  
And more, much more than this,  
I did it my way." _Jesse's words hit like knives, worse than those from either Queen performance. This was his song, she couldn't deny. He was good, and if this performance didn't win them Nationals, then there was something severely wrong with the Show Choir world.

"_Yes there were times I'm sure you knew  
When I bit off more than I could chew.  
But through it all when there was doubt,  
I ate it up and spit it out.  
I faced it all and I stood tall  
And did it my way," _He was at the stage by this point, looking in every direction about the auditorium. Rachel laughed to herself, he was going to use his charm to win over every member in the audience.

"_I've loved, I've laughed and cried  
I've had my fill, my share of losing.  
And now as tears subside  
I find it all so amusing.  
To think I did all that  
And may I say, not in a shy way  
Oh no, oh no not me. I did it my way." _ The rest of Vocal Adrenaline were staring at Jesse in awe. Rachel was quite sure that not even they had seen this much heart and soul from a St. James performance. _  
_

"_For what is a man, what has he got  
If not himself, then he has not  
To say the things he truly feels  
And not the words of one who kneels  
The record shows  
I took the blows  
And did it my way." _Jesse quickly wiped a mixture of sweat and tears from his cheek as he took a deep breath during the short instrumental break, and lowered his head.

"_Yes, it was my way."_ Jesse lifted his head as the last line rang out, looking directly at the back of the theatre. Rachel was almost sure he saw her, but if he had, he made no reaction.

Jesse finished the song with a smirk, he was sure that it would make the judges melt. The opening chords to rang out in the theater, and Rachel turned her attention to a girl front and center. Rachel recognized her as the "Galileo" girl from Regionals, and she was complete caught off guard when the girl burst into a powerful rendition of "Telephone." So they were going to do Lady Gaga after all. Rachel was curious to how the males would be included in such a piece, and she was awestruck by the intense choreography. Suddenly and without warning, Jesse began paralleling the female vocals with that of his own, but with an entirely different song altogether. Was Vocal Adrenaline truly doing a mashup of "Telephone" and "Never Gonna Give You Up" at Nationals? Rachel couldn't deny they were creative. Jesse looked incredibly amused throughout the performance, vocally competing with the female lead while the rest of the group continued their stellar routine.

Wordlessly, the group took their starting positions for "Paint it Black." Rachel began to panic. She would have to confront him when rehearsal was over, but she would have to do it when he was alone. Would that even be possible?

Beth began to cry in the middle of the song, so Shelby just waved her students away and carried Beth into the lobby. They finished the song, and stood awkwardly. Jesse immediately took charge.

"I would safely assume this means rehearsal is over. Remember everyone, we're leaving tomorrow at six sharp in front of the main doors. If you're not here by quarter 'till, you're not coming on the trip. We're not going to wait for anyone. Alright. Get some sleep; drink some tea. We're gonna do this!" Jesse said. He brought them in to a circle, where they shouted, "ONEGA ONEGADIS ERIS" at the top of their lungs, and then split. He gathered his things and ran offstage, and Rachel quickly snuck out the back and down the hall that lead to the dressing rooms. She watched carefully as she counted the rest of the male leads exiting, and she peeked into the room—Jesse wasn't there. Devastated, she turned, but then heard a familiar voice echoing from the Vocal Adrenaline music wing. Looking behind her to assure no one saw her, she hurried down and peeked in the door to their choral room. Jesse was practicing "My Way," giving his heart and soul to the song. Rachel carefully pushed the door open, and Jesse stopped abruptly. He turned to attack his interrupter, and stopped dead.

"Rachel! What are you doing here?" he growled. "Does anyone know you're here? Did anyone see you?" he pulled her into the classroom and shut the door quickly behind her, glancing down the hallway.

"No—"

"What the hell are you doing here?" he hissed. Rachel scowled and folded her arms.

"Look, Jesse, I tried calling but you never answered."

"I don't pick up my phone the week of Nationals. It's just a distraction.'

"Right. Well listen, there's something we need to talk about—"

"Rachel, what we had is over and done with. You need to accept that and move on."

Although the words stung like knives, Rachel took a deep breath and proceeded.

"Look, Jesse…I'm pregnant."

There was a moment of stunned silence, and then the explosion.

"Why would you tell me this? I can't believe you would stoop this low and try to distract me from Nationals by telling me lies!" he made for the door.

"Jesse wait!" Rachel cried after him. He spun to look at her bitterly.

"You're a bitch Rachel Berry. A bitch and a liar," he hissed, before slamming the door behind him and leaving Rachel alone and confused in a foreign choir room. She collapsed in a chair and cried for what felt like hours, when a knock and a soft cry alerted her to someone's presence.

"Rachel?" Shelby asked, Beth in her arms. Rachel looked up and wiped her eyes.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I shouldn't be here," she made for the door, but Shelby held her arm gently.

"Rachel, sweetie, what's going on?" she adjusted Beth in her arms and furrowed her brow. Rachel took a deep breath.

"I came to see Jesse," she admitted. Shelby nodded.

"I figured that much. I know his return to us most have broken your heart, and Rachel. I'm so sorry," Shelby was trying her best to be polite and motherly, but watching her hold the baby so lovingly was painful.

"Shelby, I need to ask you something," Rachel bit her lip. Surprised by the formality of her name, Shelby looked at her estranged daughter with concern.

"Yes?"

"Was it hard to give up a baby?"

Shelby fidgeted uncomfortably.

"Oh Rachel, I know you must be feeling replaced, but I want you to know—" Rachel shook her head.

"No," she whispered, lifting her shirt to reveal an ever so slight bump on her lower abdomen. Shelby's eyes widened with shock, then fear, and then concern, never lifting from the bump.

"Rachel, baby," she whispered, then finally looked up at her biological daughter. "Jesse?" she asked. Rachel nodded, beginning to tear again.

"That's what I was doing here. I tried to explain to him, but he didn't believe me," Shelby frowned, gesturing at her daughter's stomach. "I never got to show him," she explained. "He stormed out before I could. He thinks I'm lying to him to distract him from the performance Saturday." Shelby nodded, overwhelmed with information and guilt.

"And you're sure it's not that Chesapeake boy or whatever his name was?" Rachel let out a laugh for the first time all day.

"Hudson. And no, Jesse's the only one I…" she trailed off, and Shelby took a deep breath.

"Do you want me to try to explain?" she ventured halfheartedly. Rachel shook her head, and Shelby looked relieved.

"No," Rachel swallowed. "If he doesn't want to be a part of this than I don't want to force him," she turned away from her mother with a heavy heart. "Break a leg at Nationals," she said as she reached the door. "You've got a great set, and Jesse's a star," she smiled weakly and exited the room, leaving mother and daughter alone. Shelby called after her daughter from the doorframe.

'"Yes?" Rachel asked, spinning.

"Do you know what you're having?" Rachel shook her head.

'They said it was shy," she smiled softly, turning on her heel and continuing on her way.


	6. I Look At You

That Saturday night, Rachel sat, refreshing the National Show Choir website every three minutes in order to find out the results of the competition. Although she was almost sure Vocal Adrenaline had it in the bag, a hidden, dark part of her wanted Jesse to see what it felt like to suffer, what it felt like to lose. Finally, at nine fifty-seven, the link is up: "The Results Are In—2010 National Champions!" Rachel clicked through nervously, and finally, her nerves are calmed, of course they won. How could they not, with Jesse's phenomenal performance. She smiled, happy that Jesse and her mother had ended on high notes. She giggled at her pun, and put a hand to her stomach.

"Hi baby," she said, smiling. "Hello. Why are you a shy thing? Hmm?" she teared slightly, but continued. "It's okay, momma's here. You and I are going to get along fine, with or without daddy. Okay?" She took a deep breath and sighed, continuing to surf the Show Choir webpage. This time, as she refreshed the main page, she came upon an interview with Vocal Adrenaline. Anxiously, she pressed play.

"This is Chloe Morrison here with six time National Champion winners, Vocal Adrenaline," said the young woman with a microphone. Vocal Adrenaline cheered, and Chloe turned to Shelby. "Is it true this is your last competition with Vocal Adrenaline?" she asked. Shelby nodded.

"Regretfully, yes, at least for now. I recently had a baby," she said, interrupted with, "Wow, you look great!" from the reporter. Shelby laughed, "Well, I have a baby now, and I need to make sure I raise her well. I love these kids, and I'm going to miss them terribly, but the time has come for me to go," she said, blowing a kiss to her kids. Chloe took the microphone back and turned back to the camera.

"Next, we have the idol of Vocal Adrenaline, Jesse St. James," she said. As Jesse walked onscreen, Rachel sucked in a breath. His curls stuck to his forehead with sweat, but he was beaming. Her heart began to pound as he began to speak.

"Thanks Chloe. The past four years have been an amazing experience, which I wouldn't have traded for anything. I'm off to UCLA on a music scholarship and I'm thrilled to be getting out of Ohio, but Vocal Adrenaline has given me something that I will keep with me my entire life, and music will be my one true love," he said, grinning at the camera. Someone handed him the trophy from off-screen, and he held it over his head, shouting excitedly. Rachel rolled her eyes and exited the browser window.

"Garbage," she muttered.

School was out now, and Rachel's first actors workshop would be starting soon. Quinn would text her often to assure she was doing well, and she'd had a disastrous date with Finn that had ended in her crying throughout the entire Kung Fu movie. She was home alone, curled up on the sofa watching "He's Just Not that Into You" and crying into her bowl of ice cream when she heard the doorbell. Frustrated, Rachel meandered to the front door, opening it to reveal Shelby, carrying Beth in a portable carseat. Surprised, Rachel glanced down at her sloppy sweatpants and tee shirt, and looked back up at her mother.

"What are you doing here?" she asked. Shelby smiled.

"May I come in?" Rachel nodded, and her mother followed her to the living room. Rachel paused the movie and sat on the sofa, curled up in a ball. Her mother sat down, Beth at her feet, and took a deep breath.

"Rachel, listen, I've been thinking." Rachel sucked in a breath; she had never been told anything good following that phrase. "I know how horrible all of this is for you, but are you sure adoption is the way you're looking to go?" she asked. Rachel licked her lips.

"Well to be honest, I'm not sure. I mean, I want to be a star. You know how that is," she said with a half hearted smile. Shelby laughed. "And if I want to get to the top, I can't have a baby weighing me down," she said bluntly.

"Rachel," Shelby began warningly, and Rachel looked up at her. "Rachel I don't want to see you hurting," she said. Rachel looked away.

"I'm already hurting. How am I supposed to raise a baby on my own?" she questioned. Shelby let out a low chuckle.

"I am," she suggested. Rachel shook her head.

"Every time I look at this baby, I know I'm going to see his face," she wailed. "I can't go through life raising a baby that came from a love that was never reciprocated," she reached for a tissue from the box on the coffee table. Shelby took a deep breath.

"Jesse loved you," she offered. Rachel shook her head.

"No he didn't, otherwise he wouldn't have—" Shelby lifted a hand.

"Let me finish. Jesse loved you, but he loved fame more," she took a breath, and continued. "I missed out on my chance with you, and it kills me," she said, reaching out for her biological daughter, "And I can't let that happen again. If you give up this baby you _will _regret it," she warned. Rachel hiccupped.

"Shelby, maybe you should go," she said, standing. "I appreciate everything you're doing but I just can't handle this right now." Shelby took Beth and walked towards the door. "Congratulations," Rachel said to her mother, and Shelby took Rachel into her arms as she set Beth down.

"Whatever you decide, baby," she whispered into her daughter's ear. " I love you," she said as she pulled away, picked up the baby, and exited the front door. Rachel broke down, crumpling to the floor.


	7. Friends

Rachel was thrilled to have her workshops to keep her busy. As usual, she was given leads at the end of the week performances for her acting classes, and solos at the vocal camps. But by week four of the six-week day camp, one of her instructors pulled her aside after she had to pull herself from the extensive dance rehearsal for "You Can't Stop The Beat."

"Rachel, you're doing fabulously, really. We're thrilled to have you."

"Thank you Miss Bean," Rachel beamed. Miss Bean looked uncomfortable.

"However, the other instructors and I were concerned about any...personal issues you might be facing," she questioned. Rachel was devastated; she had tried to hide it as well as she possibly could.

"I'm pregnant," Rachel admitted. Miss Bean sucked in a sharp breath.

"Oh Rachel, you know what this means," Miss Bean said regretfully. Rachel began to tear up.

"Miss Bean please, please don't kick me out of the camp. Please," she whined.

"Rachel, we run a family friendly camp. We can't very well have the parents come to see these performances and have a pregnant girl running around onstage!"

"Please Miss Bean. This is all I have left," she wiped the tears away with her hand. The instructor closed her eyes.

"Fine. But really, Rachel, you've got to get better at hiding that bump," the woman warned. Rachel glanced down, embarrassed. She was still wearing most of her own clothing because the few things that Quinn had given her were either too large or not appropriate to be worn as rehearsal gear. "How far along are you?" Miss Bean asked. Rachel licked her lips.

"About fifteen weeks," she admitted. Miss Bean nodded.

"Boy or girl?"

"I…don't know," she said in defeat. "They say the baby's shy."

As a relieved Rachel returned home that evening, she was surprised to find Finn's car in her driveway. He got out of his car and met her at the walk.

"Hey Rach," he smiled. She looked at him with a raised eyebrow.

"Hi Finn. I thought you had vowed not to talk to me after I ruined your favorite Jackie Chan movie," she said. Finn shrugged.

"It wasn't that great of a movie," he admitted. Rachel smiled slightly.

"Can I ask what you're doing here, Finn?" she asked as she fumbled with her keys in the lock.

"I wanted to see you," he said, following her into the house. "We really had a shot for a little while and I want to get that back," he said. Rachel looked up awkwardly.

"What?"

"I know this really sucks for you," he said, motioning to her stomach. Rachel raised an eyebrow and looked at him. "But I want us to be together Rachel," he said. She looked at him in shock.

"I can't be a couple with you," she said. Finn rolled his eyes.

"Why not? I don't get you Rachel. When are you going to realize that he's never coming back?"

"I'm having this baby Finn. I can't allow myself to be in a committed relationship when this baby is going to come out and remind me of all the reasons why I love Jesse. That isn't fair to you, and it isn't fair to me, and it especially isn't fair to the baby."

"So that's it then?" Finn asked, looking dejected. "I'm supposed to give up every feeling I have about you?" Taking a deep breath, Rachel spun to face him

"Yes," she said, tears in her eyes. "I loved you, Finn, but I was just a girl. You were just a boy I couldn't have. But this, this baby, my whole heart belongs to it. Whether or not Jesse comes back, I'm never going to be able to love anyone as much as I love this baby," she swallowed and sniffed. "And in time, you'll come to realize that anything we ever had or could have had was never real. The whole time it was built on a fantasy of being characters. You were supposed to be the one man I could never get until the end, and we would ride off in the sunset. But things like this," she pointed to her stomach, "don't happen to fictional characters. You don't marry your high school sweetheart who had a baby with another man," she said swallowing hard. Finn smiled halfheartedly at her.

"You really think we'd never work?" he asked innocently. Rachel sniffed and shook her head.

"If you'd asked me this a year ago, I would have insisted we would. But I've grown up, Finn. And so should you," she said, tenderly putting a hand on his arm. He didn't shudder away like she expected, but he didn't look her in the eye.

"This sucks," he said, and she laughed.

"Yeah it does," she smiled.

"Rachel, if you'd never…if this had never happened, would we have had a shot?" Finn questioned. Closing her eyes for a moment, Rachel shook her head.

"Yes…and no. We would have tried, but we were a wrong fit from the start, Finn. You know that, and so do I. I'm high maintenance, to say the least, and you're so…laid back, so carefree. We were like the same ends of a magnet. Sure, they're similar, but try to force them together, and it's never going to work." She took a deep breath. "But I want to be friends," she ventured.

They stared at each other for some time, before a car door slammed and the doorbell rang. Rachel looked away and headed towards the door.

"Quinn!" she gasped, surprised. She moved out of the way as the blonde carried in a large cardboard box. "What's all this?" she asked.

"Clothes," Quinn huffed as she set the box on the floor near the stairs. "Don't you dare try carrying this up there yourself, I will not let you hurt that baby," Quinn warned. She turned and saw Finn, and smiled awkwardly. "Hi."

"Hey," Finn smirked. "What's up?"

"Quinn you didn't have to do all this, " Rachel said, digging through the box.

"Why not? They're not doing any good sitting at my house," she reasoned. Finn furrowed his eyebrows.

"So wait, you guys are like, friends now?" he asked. The two females looked at one another awkwardly.

"Uh…"

"I just brought her pants, Finn. Come on," Quinn huffed. Rachel nodded, laughing uncomfortably.

"You guys are friends now!" Finn said incredulously.

"So what, I can't just be nice to people?"

"Yeah, once this baby pops out we'll probably go back to hating each other," Rachel reasoned, but the two girls looked at one another and started to giggle. Finn was completely confused. Motherhood was a power that no man would ever be able to comprehend—it was the one thing that could take two enemies and give them one common bond that could never be broken.

"Now I have to warn you, the elastic waist jeans suck, but once you explode, they're the best things ever. I just hated wearing them to school because they made me feel old and fat."

"_One questions haunts and hurts, too much, too much to mention.  
Was I really seeking good, or just seeking attention?" _

Flutter.

There she was, onstage at camp, in the middle of her song during "Wicked" week. She assumed it was her stomach rumbling, perhaps she hadn't eaten enough for lunch that day.

"_Is that all good deeds are when looked at with an ice col…" _

Flutter.

It was the baby. The little flutter in her stomach was the baby moving. Rachel immediately choked up, a hand instinctively reaching for her stomach. Her instructors eyed each other warningly, but Rachel took a deep breath and continued.

"My apologies," she admitted, while the piano kept going. She continued, the baby urging her to go on.

As the song ended and her performance judged, she rushed offstage, pulling out her cell phone and rushing to the parking lot. Excitedly, she dialed Leroy's number.

"Daddy! I felt the baby! It moved today!" she exclaimed, beaming. Her father expressed his congratulations, and she soon hung up, continuing down the list of people she felt obliged to tell.

"Quinn? I felt the baby!"

"Mercedes, you'll never believe it. The baby moved today!"

"Finn, the baby moved! No, it was not just gas. You are such a downer."

She continued to scroll through numbers on her phone. When she reached Jesse, she swallowed. Although she knew she should inform him of such a momentous occasion in the growth of their child, she couldn't be bothered. He was probably already in California, trying out for local productions and getting settled in his apartment before he began classes in August. He wouldn't care anyway, he didn't believe that it was real.

"You liked that song, didn't you baby?" she asked her stomach as she sat on a bench outside the theatre. "I like it too. I think it's fitting for momma," she laughed.

"Rachel Berry?" there was a voice. She looked up to find Andrea Cohen, the outstanding soloist from Vocal Adrenaline.

"Hi, Andrea?" Rachel ventured, attempting to not be nearly as much of a creep as she once was.

"Yeah, Andrea Cohen. We met once, outside of a Vocal Adrenaline rehearsal, remember? I was throwing up in the trash and Shoshandra was holding back my hair?"

"Right," Rachel laughed, standing to shake her hand.

"You're here for the Arts Academy, I take it?" Andrea asked. Rachel nodded.

"I've been coming every year since I was nine," Rachel explained. Andrea smiled.

"That explains your phenomenal performance at Sectionals. Seriously, I leaned over to Shelby…she's our…well, she was our coach. I quit after our Sectionals because of my health, and she quit because she had a baby. Well, not had a baby, she adopted, but you know what I mean," Andrea rambled. "But anyway, I leaned over to Shelby and said, "Damn, that girl could be playing Fanny Brice on Broadway right now, she's that good," Andrea laughed. "I heard you dated Jesse, that had to be weird. I always thought he was kind of douche-y, to be honest." Rachel laughed and nodded.

"Yeah, he is," Rachel shrugged, her hand instinctively reaching for her stomach. Andrea's gaze followed her hand, and her eyes widened.

"Oh my god you're pregnant," Andrea gasped. Rachel laughed; she was quite used to this reaction.

"Yep," she nodded. "Nearly seventeen weeks," she added. "It just started moving today!" Andrea's head snapped up.

"Really?"

"Yeah. There I am, right at the climax of "No Good Deed," and this little one starts flailing about," she laughed. "And no, I don't know what it is, because it wasn't facing the right way during the sonogram," she snorted. "Which is strange because you would think being the child of two superstars, it would want to be front and center."

"May I?" Andrea reached towards Rachel's stomach.

"Sure," Rachel laughed, she wasn't used to being treated in this manner; most everyone she knew from Glee had already accepted it, they were unphased because of Quinn. "You probably won't feel anything, but," she lifted her shirt slightly, while Andrea smiled and placed a palm over the bump.

"Who's the father?" she questioned. Rachel sucked in a breath.

"A douchebag," she smirked. Andrea's head snapped up to look at her.

"Oh no," she said. Rachel nodded.

"But he refuses to believe it. Thought I was trying to distract him from Nationals," Rachel laughed coldly. Andrea shook her head in disbelief.

"That's bullshit," she growled, checking the time on her cell phone. "Hey, what time is your last workshop?"

"It ends at 4:30," Rachel replied. Andrea grinned.

"Same. Would you like to go out and get some dinner with me after this?" Rachel beamed at the offer.

"Absolutely," she said.

"Okay, I'll meet you here at 4:30, okay?"


	8. Dreams

The two girls shared a booth at Dennys, giggling as the attractive male waiters passed by their table with envy, Rachel's belly hidden perfectly below the table.

"Hey I'm Chri—oh my god, Andrea?" the waiter asked incredulously.

"Hey Chris! How are you?" the girl asked, smiling politely. "Still a senior?" Chris shook his head.

"Nah. Once Jesse and Miss Corcoran left, I figured it was my time to go as well," he shrugged, looking towards Rachel. "Oh shit, you're the egg girl!" he laughed, putting a hand to his mouth. Andrea furrowed her eyebrows.

"What are you talking about, Chris?"

"Remember how we used to do the funkification, right? Well we're on our way to Aural Intensity, and Giselle's like, "Guys, let's just go to McKinley again and get that Rachel girl," and Jesse's all "No, don't do it guys," and Giselle's all, "If you're not with us you're against us," and we couldn't have that so he agreed and we drove over to McKinley and Jesse called her and we egged her in the parking lot," Chris explained through his giggles. Rachel kept her eyes locked on the salt shaker. Andrea's nostrils flared.

"Chris, I think we'll be needing another waiter," she seethed.

"What? Why?" he asked, utterly confused.

"Because you're an asshole, that's why," Andrea snapped.

"Whatever," Chris walked away, asking another server to take over, while Andrea looked at Rachel.

"Wow. Like, seriously, how stupid do you have to be to _tell _the person a story about how you wrecked them. Right?" Andrea looked at her menu again. Rachel, however, could only see the moment in her mind. The looks Jesse had given her, the way he had hesitated. Of course, how could she not see it? He hadn't wanted to be there, hadn't wanted to do what he had to, but he was loyal to his team before he was loyal to her.

_I loved you. _

_But I love being a star more. _

Rachel swallowed and smiled at Andrea. She wasn't about to let this spoil their dinner; destroy what could be a great ally. Andrea sighed.

"So Jesse doesn't believe you?" Rachel laughed and shook her head.

"I never got to show him the bump or the sonogram picture. And he's gone by now, I'm sure. He had said he was leaving as soon as school didn't have him tied down anymore," she played absentmindedly with her fork.

"Ugh, this isn't fair!" Andrea complained. "From what I've seen of you, you're a really decent person, Rachel. Why would he do this to you?"

"Because he wanted to get out of here, just like the rest of us," Rachel laughed. Andrea snorted. "Where are you headed, anyway?"

"University of Pittsburgh," she said, "Don't get off topic! If Jesse really cared about you, why wouldn't he at least make sure you were okay if you're having his baby?"

"Because when you love something, you gotta go for it," she said, smiling as her eyes welled up with tears. "His passion was performing. Who was I to keep him from what he loved?" she wiped her eyes with a napkin as their new server approached the table.

"Hi, I'm Deb, what can I get for you today?"

"Can I get a water please?" Rachel said, attempting to free her eyes of tears.

"Of course, and you?"

"Diet cola please," Andrea said. The waitress left the table, and Andrea looked at Rachel sorrowfully.

"You really love him don't you?"

"More than you could ever imagine. But I also know what's best for him, and it isn't me, and it certainly isn't this baby."

"Rachel Berry, you may be the strongest woman I've ever met," Andrea said, taking her hand across the table. Rachel laughed, wiping her eyes with her napkin as Deb put their drinks on the table. They ordered meals and continued to laugh. Rachel had never felt so comfortable with another female individual before.

As they shared a slice of Oreo pie, Rachel was surprised to find herself confiding things in Andrea that she had never even shared with Jesse, and the girl listened to her, understanding and agreeing with almost everything. Rachel had to wonder if this is what it was like to have a best friend.

"Have you thought about names?" Andrea asked as they finished the slice of pie. Rachel shook her head.

"Honestly no. I mean, I don't know what the sex is, plus I don't know if I'm even keeping it—"

Andrea dropped her fork.

"What do you mean? I thought you loved it?"

"I do," Rachel backtracked. "It's just…ugh. I want to be a star, Andrea. I can't have a baby and be a star." Andrea laughed bitterly.

"I wanted to be a star too Rachel," Andrea said lightly. "But sometimes, life has other plans. When the doctors told me I was sick and could never exert myself again, especially not with dancing, my heart shattered. It was my whole life, I loved singing and performing. But I valued my life and my health more, and so I resigned from Vocal Adrenaline. They didn't understand at first, some of the small minded ones like Chris still don't," Andrea sighed. "I wasn't going to tell you this Rachel because I know how badly you're hurting, but I lied to you. Jesse was never a douchebag. He was one of the only people who came to me and asked me how I was handling not being able to perform. He would watch me sneak into rehearsals and cry while they exhausted themselves onstage. He knew how much I hated having to watch my dreams go up in smoke. But you know what he said to me?" she took the brunette's hand again. ""Andrea, sometimes you have to find other ways to make your dreams come true when life hits you with something unexpected." So I decided to become a music educator, so that I could still keep my dreams without hurting myself," Andrea smiled.

"Rachel, you can keep this baby and still make your dreams come true. It just might not be in the way you expected. Just like you can tell Jesse about this baby, and he can still make his come true. " Rachel looked away, sniffing.

"I just don't know what to do."

"Do what your heart tells you, Rachel Berry," Andrea said, smiling. "Here's my cell number, you call me if you ever need _anything._"


	9. Glide Away On Soapy Heels

At six twenty-three on the morning of August 15, Rachel Berry heard a buzzing from her cell phone on the nightsand. Groggily, she sat up and answered.

"Hullo?" she answered sleepily.

"Rachel, it's Andrea. Listen, just drove past Jesse's house, they're packing the car _now. _I stopped to say my goodbyes and he he's leaving at nine. You need to go. Now."

"Andrea, please. He doesn't want to see me," Rachel argued, the baby doing somersaults.

"Rachel, please, don't be stupid. This is your last chance, you need to do this," Andrea begged. Rachel rubbed her temple.

"What are you doing driving at six in the morning?"

"I work….Rachel stop changing the subject!" Andrea shouted into the telephone. "I will **not** let you blow this!" she said curtly before she hung up. Agitated and terrified, Rachel threw on some yoga pants and the tee she had received from the Academy, and dialed Quinn's number. Andrea had better have been right.

"What in the **hell **could you possibly need at six in the morning?" Quinn asked irritably as she answered, sounding exhausted.

"You're going to kill me," Rachel began.

The two girls sped down the freeway. It was already seven forty-six, and Rachel's heart was thundering in her chest.

"I still don't understand why you feel this is necessary. I thought you'd already decided you weren't going to pester him anymore?" Quinn asked as she kept her eyes steadily on the road, a large 7-11 coffee in the cupholder to her right.

"I know, I did…but that was when I thought he'd left already! And I wish you'd met Andrea, she's really nice and she cares a lot about both of us."

"This just seems sketchy, that's all I'm saying," Quinn grumbled as she took a sip of coffee.

They turned on to the street Jesse lived on, which Rachel had only visited once, but she still remembered clear as day.

"Wait, wait!" Rachel hissed, as though he could hear her outside the car.

"What?" Quinn asked, rolling her eyes.

"He can't see us! Stop in front of this house," she pointed. "Slow!" she hissed. She watched carefully, and her heart stopped as she watched him walk out of the house carrying a large cardboard box.

"Well, what are you waiting for? Go!" Quinn nodded. Rachel shook her head furiously.

"I can't."

"You've got to be kidding me. We did **not **drive all the way out here just to have you chicken out!"

"He's looking!" Rachel shrieked as she slumped down in the seat. Quinn followed her example.

"Did he see us?" Quinn asked.

"I have no idea," Rachel peeked over the dashboard. Jesse was still heaving boxes into the trunk and backseat of his car. She watched him slam the doors shut and walk back into the house. Nine oh-three. She watched him hug his mother and father curtly, say something to them, laugh, nod, and get in the car. She took a sharp breath as he backed out of the driveway. "Follow him!" she shrieked as he made down the road.

"What?"

"Go!" Rachel was leaning forward nervously.

They followed him down Spruce Lane, across a few lanes of traffic, and finally back on the freeway—back in the direction of Lima.

They returned the two hours and forty minutes the had driven before Quinn pulled off at the Lima exit.

"No! What are you doing?" Rachel shrieked.

"Rachel, this is ridiculous. We are not following him all the way to California, okay? You had a chance to talk with him and you let it pass you by. I'm sorry, but I can't let you keep doing this to yourself." Quinn spat, frustrated, both hands on the steering wheel.

They drove back to Rachel's house in silence, tears racing down Rachel's cheeks.

"Rachel, please stop trying to make me feel guilty," Quinn finally spoke. "I would have followed him, you know that. But you and I also know that even if I had, you never would have had the courage to say anything." Quinn pulled into Rachel's driveway. "I'm sorry," she said again as they got out of her car. The baby was still kicking, and Rachel looked down at her stomach in tears.

"I'm sorry I let you down, baby. I just can't do it," she whispered. They walked into the house, Quinn rifling through the kitchen cabinets to find something for lunch while Rachel sat down on a chair, tears still falling. Quinn set a sandwich in front of her and sat down.

"Rachel, we need to seriously discuss this baby. What are you going to do? Because if you're going to give it up you should start looking for someone now," Quinn started, but Rachel's head snapped up.

"Quinn, please, _please _just stop. I don't know. It's my choice, it's my life. I'm not ready," Rachel said, running a hand lovingly over her bump. Quinn just closed her eyes.

"I know what it's like. There are times when I wonder what would have been if I had kept Beth. But then I realize that I _never _could have handled it, and I don't know that you will either Rachel," Quinn said. Rachel shook her head.

"I just don't know Quinn. I just, there's something in me that feels like if he just saw me, he'd realize how much he does love me and he'd come back—"

"Rachel, stop living in the clouds, please! You told Finn life wasn't a fantasy, why can't you convince yourself?" Quinn threw a dishtowel towards the floor.

"Because I love him!" Rachel shouted. There was silence as the two girls looked at one another for what felt like hours, tears streaming down both of their faces.

"I loved Finn," Quinn finally spoke. "I know I have no excuse for what I did, but I did love him. And I tried, oh how I tried to convince myself I loved Puck, that he and I could have a happy life and raise our baby girl. But when it comes down to it, I knew we never could. And I'm never going to have that love again," Quinn sighed, picking up the dishtowel and hanging it on the rack near the sink. Rachel stood.

"Says who?" she asked. Quinn laughed.

"Really Rachel, Finn's not that stupid. He'll never trust me again, no matter what he comes to feel. And besides, he's still pretty hung up on you."

Rachel giggled and hugged the blonde girl.

"Things don't have to stay the way they are. It's a new year, a new start. What if you tried getting back together with him?" Rachel suggested. Quinn shook her head.

"No way," she said. Rachel scowled.

"Why not? We can change things, Quinn. You and I can make a difference," she smiled. Quinn bit her lip.

"Do you really think so?" she asked. Rachel grinned and took the blonde's hand.

"I know so."


	10. ChChChChanges

When a visibly pregnant Rachel Berry walked in next to Quinn Fabray, the formerly pregnant, ex-captain of the Cheereos, it was as though the status quo had exploded.

"Is getting knocked up contagious now?" Karofsky asked, jeering.

"Back off Karofsky," Quinn hissed as the two girls walked confidently down the hall. Sue Sylvester walked out of her office, in awe at the two ladies.

"Fabray, halt," she said. Quinn spun confidently.

"Yes Miss Sylvester?"

"I request that you immediately refrain from spending time with this loser and get your ass to the cheer tryouts on Thursday. We need you back, Fabray, now that you're in top shape again."

There was a moment of hesitation, while Rachel watched Quinn nervously. She understood Quinn's desire to be well liked and popular; she shared a very similar one. Quinn closed her eyes in mental debate, but finally snapped them open and shook her head.

"No thanks Miss Sylvester. I'd rather go somewhere where I won't have to put on a polyester suit to be accepted," she smirked, walking back to an awestruck Rachel.

"Do you realize what you just did?" Rachel asked her. Quinn nodded.

"Yep. I confirmed my happiness," Quinn grinned, putting an arm around the pregnant girl.

The pair walked into Glee club, and Mercedes let out a yell.

"Oh my god, girl!" she shouted when she saw Rachel's stomach. She walked to the girl and gave her a hug, admiring the stomach.

"My god, you look like a whale," Kurt said. Tina smacked his arm and Mercedes gave him a death glare, so he added, "A very beautiful whale?"

"Rachel you look great," Tina added.

"Yeah she does," Finn said from his stool. He smiled at Rachel, who returned it with one of her own, and then he noticed Quinn. "Hey, " he blushed. Quinn bit her lip.

"Hi," she smiled. Mr. Schue walked in excitedly.

"Okay guys, we have a _lot _to disc—holy cow, Rachel," he was distracted, and the club laughed. "Wow…anyway, we have a lot to discuss. We need to start working now so that we can be unstoppable at Regionals, so I've picked out a few pieces that I think we should attempt this fall," he said, passing out some sheet music. "I tried to pick songs that would fit everyone's personalities and everyone's styles, and I hope I did a good job," he said, sitting down on a stool.

"Jay Sean!" Mercedes squealed. "Oh my god I love this song," she said, beaming from ear to ear.

"I'm Lil Wayne?" Artie said, shocked but thrilled.

"Carry on My Wayward Son?" Finn grinned. "Dude this is like, the one song I kill at on Rockband."

"Yea, Mr. Schue can we play Rockband while we sing this?" Puck added.

"Seasons of Love!" Rachel beamed. "Do you have any idea how much I've loved this song. Ever since my dads took me to see a performance when I was six, it's meant so much to me because of its subject matter and the way it represents gays in America—"

"Taylor Swift? Really Mr. Schue?" Quinn laughed.

"Listen guys. I know we were all pretty low last year dealing with losing Regionals. But I have the faith in you guys that we can pull through this year," he said, smiling. Rachel bit her lip while Mercedes and Kurt held hands. "I have some news. We're going to have a new member joining our club this year. His name is Sam, and he's just moved here from Maryland. Sam, you wanna come in?" he said towards the door.

A skinny, awkward, but handsome boy walked in, shuffling his feet. He smiled at the club and waved, shrugging.

"Hi guys," he said. Rachel and Quinn both looked at Kurt.

"Oh sweet Mary Jesus," he mumbled, unable to take his eyes off the new boy. The girls giggled.

"We're glad to have you Sam," Mr. Schue said, shaking his hand. The boy sat down next to Finn, and Mr. Schue clapped his hands. "Okay guys, let's get started. Regionals, here we come!"

Rachel and Quinn were on their way to math when Rachel stopped dead. "Quinn, it's kicking! Quick!" she said, grabbing the blonde's hand. The two girls stood, smiling, and Rachel laughed.

"Get a room, lesbians," Azimo laughed, high fiving Karofsky.

"Screw you," Rachel spat. Quinn giggled.

"Hey, are you two taking your babies to the gay pride parade?"

"Hey, **back off**," Finn growled, pushing Karofsky. "They didn't do anything to you!"

"We warned your bitch ass. It's time to pay up," Azimo said. Rachel was unsure whose punch was thrown first, but she instantly saw Finn and Karofsky hit the floor, with standing for back up.

As if on cue, Puck, Mike, and Matt rushed in for backup. Mike thrust a quick punch to Karofsky's gut, while Puck tried to pull Azimo off Finn. Rachel was crying and holding onto Quinn, while Mr. Schue and another teacher tried to end the brawl. Miss Pillsbury walked into the hallway and shrieked, noticing the two girls so close to the fight. She confidently walked over and pulled them out of the line of fire.

"Are you girls okay?" she asked. Quinn nodded, while Rachel held her hands over the baby.

"If you don't stop fighting right now, you are all going to be suspended," Principal Figgins shouted above the noise of the fight.

Mr. Schuester had Karofsky in a death grip, while Principal Figgins grabbed Azimo by the collar of his letterman jacket.

"We wouldn't have to fight if these homos would just get out of our school," he said. Karofsky spit towards Finn, and Mr. Schuester pushed him up against the lockers.

"Those homos are my students," he hissed in his face.

"Will," Principal Figgins warned. The two perpetrators were taken into his office, while Finn bent over, wiping blood off his face.

"Yo man, you alright?" Puck asked.

"What the hell happened?" Matt asked. Finn looked up.

"Nobody talks to the girls like that and gets away with it," he said. Quinn and Rachel looked at him, blood still dripping from his nose and running from his mouth. Rachel rushed over and wrapped her arms around him; he put a hand to her head and held her close as Quinn looked on. They locked eyes, and she smiled.

"Thank you Finn," Rachel whispered. Mr. Schuester had returned, and he was seething.

"This is absurd. What did they say to you?" he asked the girls, but Quinn shook her head.

"It's no big deal Mr. Schue," she shrugged.

"Yeah, we're used to being losers, remember?" she agreed. Mr. Schue's face lit up.

"That gives me an idea," he said.


	11. For The Losers

"Okay guys, from the top!" Mr. Schue said from the audience. The group stood in their usual formation, with the addition of Sam. There was a short intro by the jazz band, and Finn began to sing. His black eyes were nearly healed by now, and he was dressed in a crisp white shirt and bow tie, while the girls wore strapless black dresses.

"_Here's to those who love not too wisely, know not wisely, but too well." _

"_To the girl who sighs with envy when she hears that wedding bell,"_ Rachel chimed in, stepping next to him and smiling. Artie wheeled up next to them, and they both turned.

"_To the guy who'd throw a party if he knew someone to call,"_ he laughed as he sang, and the rest of the ensemble stepped in, doing the choreographed dance.

"_Here's to the losers, bless them all,"_ Puck stepped in and spun Rachel carefully, while Finn spun Quinn. Puck stepped forward to utter his lines.

"_Here's to those who drink their dinners when that lady doesn't show." _

"_To the girl who'll wait for kisses underneath that mistletoe,"_ Mercedes belted, upstaging nearly everyone.

"_To the lonely summer lovers when the leaves begin to fall,"_ Kurt and Quinn sang this line in unison, and grinned widely at one another as the ensemble came in to finish the verse.

"_Here's to the losers, bless them all."_

"_Hey, Tom, Dick and Harry, come in out of the rain,"_ Matt, Mike, and Finn sang.

"_Those torches you carry must be drowned in champagne," _Kurt finished.

"_Here's the last toast of the evening, here's to those who still believe,"_ Rachel sang out, holding hands with Finn and Quinn.

"_All the losers will be winners, all the givers shall receive,"_ Mercedes wailed.

"_Here's to trouble-free tomorrows, may your sorrows all be small,"_ Finn sang.

"_Here's to the losers, bless them all."_ There was a large dance break, which Rachel tried her best at, although it was tiring. Finn gave her an encouraging smile, which she reciprocated, and Matt lifted her into a spin, causing her to giggle.

"_Hey, Tom, Dick and Harry, come in out of that rain,"_ Tina, Santana, and Brittany echoed, while Artie wheeled to the front.

"_Those torches you carry must be drowned in champagne." _

"_Here's the last toast of the evening, here's to those who still believe.  
All the losers will be winners, all the givers shall receive.  
Here's to trouble-free tomorrows, may your sorrows all be small  
Here's to the losers, here's to the losers, here's to the losers  
Bless them all!" _ As they completed the song, Mr. Schue stood, clapping in approval.

"Yes, guys, that was great. We might be able to pull that one off for sectionals!" He grinned.

The baby was kicking up a storm, and Rachel put a loving hand on her stomach.

"The baby likes it," she laughed. The group smiled and made their way to the front row of the auditorium.

"What is it, anyway?" Artie asked, wheeling down the newly installed ramp. Rachel shrugged.

"They don't know. It was facing the wrong way, they said it was shy," she laughed.

"Shy? With you as a mother? That's hard to believe," Mr. Schue said. Rachel giggled.

"But it's the truth. I have another one next week," she shrugged. Tina turned to her.

"How far along are you, anyway?" the boys made uncomfortable faces. They weren't used to someone talking so openly about being pregnant, since Quinn had been so quiet about hers.

"Well at the sonogram I'll be 24 weeks," she said.

That night, as Rachel was doing some baby friendly yoga and rehearsing her voice, she heard her phone ringing from her purse. She finished the pose and pushed the phone open with her chin.

"Hey Andrea!" she said excitedly, wiping her forehead with a towel.

"Hey! I'm bored at school and thought I'd call and check up on my favorite lady and her baby," Andrea sounded joyful. Rachel was glad that she had forgiven her for ignoring her suggestion to confront Jesse.

"I'm great. I have another sonogram next week, so let's hope that maybe this time the baby will decide it wants to be a star," she laughed, putting a hand on top of her stomach.

"That's awesome," she said. It was clear she had another thing on her mind, but she was unsure of how to ask it. "Rachel…"

"Yes Andrea?"

"Have you tried talking to Jesse yet?" she asked. Rachel rolled her eyes.

"No, Andrea, and I have no immediate plans to change that," Rachel said, collapsing on her bed.

"Oh…okay…" she said. There was a palpable silence over the phone lines. Rachel sat bolt upright.

"Andrea, what are you not telling me?" she asked warningly. She heard Andrea take a deep breath.

"Okay…don't freak out, okay?"


	12. You Let Me Down

"I just don't understand!" Rachel sobbed as Quinn, Mercedes, Tina, and Kurt sat with her in her bedroom.

"Well he is in college now," Kurt suggested, but Mercedes elbowed him quickly.

"How can he be in a relationship?" she asked Quinn, looking for guidance. Quinn opened her mouth, and then quickly closed it again.

"Oh sweetie, I really don't know. I mean, it's only Facebook, are you sure it's legitimate?" she ventured. Rachel began to cry harder.

"Girl, I say forget about him. He was never worth your time anyway," Mercedes suggested. Rachel's head snapped up.

"See, that would be the option I would take **if I wasn't pregnant," **Rachel hissed, throwing her tissues on the floor. Kurt rolled his eyes.

"Rachel, come on. We all knew this day would come. You just need to put yourself back on the market, start looking for a man of your own," he suggested. Rachel narrowed her eyes and glared at him.

"Oh yeah because everyone wants to date a girl who's knocked up," she mumbled. Quinn and Mercedes glanced at each other.

"That's it. You're going out this weekend."

"What?" Rachel asked, confused.

"You're going out," Mercedes repeated.

"No, guys, that's not an option," Rachel shook her head. Tina frowned, while Kurt plugged in his iPod.

"This calls for rehabilitation karaoke. Ladies?" he said. A soft piano and guitar intro came from Rachel's speakers.

"_Say you're sorry that face of an angel comes out just when you need it to…" _

Rachel was front and center on the stage, surrounded by the rest of the girls and Kurt. They were sitting on stools, and Puck sat to the left, strumming on the guitar, while Brad sat at the piano.

"_Baby I was naive, got lost in your eyes  
And never really had a chance.  
My mistake, I didn't know to be in love  
You had to fight to have the upper hand.  
I had so many dreams about you and me  
Happy endings, now I know,"_ Rachel sang painfully, with the girls swaying beside her joining in on the chorus.

"_I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairy tale  
I'm not the one you'll sweep off her feet  
Lead her up the stairwell  
This ain't Hollywood, this is a small town  
I was a dreamer before you went and let me down  
Now it's too late for you and your white horse, to come around,"_ they sang. The boys were watching them, Rachel caught Finn's eye for a moment, but quickly looked away, her hand resting on her stomach. Quinn took over as she caught eyes with Puck.

"_And there you are on your knees  
Begging for forgiveness, begging for me.  
Just like I always wanted, but I'm so sorry," _she sang, and Puck looked away. Quinn looked at Rachel and took her hand, and the two girls continued in unison.

"_Cause I'm not your princess, this ain't a fairytale.  
I'm gonna find someone someday who might actually treat me well," _they sang, and Finn smiled softly at Quinn. She blushed, and the rest of the girls joined them on the chorus.

"_This is a big world, that was a small town  
There in my rearview mirror disappearing now  
And its too late for you and your white horse  
Now its too late for you and your white horse, to catch me now…" _

Rachel sat in the waiting room at the doctors, awaiting the sonogram. She had been dropped off by Hiram on his way to work, and she was going to do a little retail therapy after her appointment. She was shuffling through a magazine when she felt someone sit next to her. She looked up to find Quinn, and she laughed.

"What are you doing here?" she questioned, smiling.

"You really thought I was going to let you do this one on your own?" Quinn took the girl's hand, and they smiled. They looked up as the front door bell rang, and were greeted by the blundering presence of Finn Hudson. He smiled sheepishly and sat on her other side.

"I forgot how to get here," he admitted. She raised an eyebrow.

"What…"

"I figured you'd like some company," he shrugged. She laughed, shaking her head.

"You guys are ridiculous. But really, I think I'm going to go in by myself this time," she said. They looked heartbroken, so Rachel added, "You're welcome to stay though, and we can get something to eat after?" she offered. They nodded. When a nurse called her back, she walked away, Quinn finally letting go of her hand. Quinn and Finn glanced at one another, then looked away suddenly. Quinn picked up a magazine, and Finn stared at the ceiling.

Rachel sat on the bed, hospital gown on and hands on her stomach. Dr. Woo came in and shook her hand.

"How are you doing Rachel?" he asked, reviewing her file.

"I'm okay. The baby's very active," she warned. Dr. Woo nodded.

"It says here you couldn't find the sex last time?" he asked. She nodded.

"Yeah. The baby's shy," she giggled. Dr. Woo nodded.

"And the father…he's still not…" he trailed off. Rachel nodded somberly.

"I highly doubt he ever will be, Doctor,' she shrugged.

"Okay, well, let's get this underway," he said, snapping on some gloves.

When her general appointment was finished, an older nurse entered and slopped on the sonogram goo, with Dr. Woo watching behind her carefully.

"Mmmhmm….well Miss Berry, loooks like you do have a shy one indeed. Not only is it facing the wrong way, but the legs are crossed," he said, pointing at the screen. Rachel shook her head.

"What does that mean, doctor?"

"That means that unless some unforeseeable major problems arise, you're not going to know the sex of the baby until it comes out," he shrugged. "It's not really that unusual," he said, acknowledging her surprised expression. "I'd just have both names picked out," he teased, walking out of the room. Rachel shook her head, cleaned herself up, and walked back to the waiting room. Quinn snapped to attention when she saw the girl.

"Well?" she asked excitedly.

"You're never going to believe this," Rachel laughed. "They still don't know."

"How can they still not know?" Finn asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Apparently I have the shyest baby in the universe. Or at least Lima, Ohio," Rachel laughed, and the trio exited the office.

They found themselves at a local diner, Rachel nibbling on some French fries. Quinn was munching on a chicken wrap, and both girls stared disgustedly at Finn's greasy hamburger.

"What?" he asked. "It's good!" They laughed, and Quinn turned her attention to Rachel.

"What are you thinking about naming it?" she asked. Rachel sighed.

"It would be a whole lot easier if I knew what it was," she argued. Quinn nodded in agreement, while Rachel put a hand to her stomach. "I was thinking something powerful, something that means a lot to me. Like maybe Eponine. Or maybe Raoul-"

"Okay that's where I have to stop you. Eponine, really?" Quinn said, giving Rachel the eyebrow look she was so well known for.

"What?" Rachel said innocently. Finn snorted into his sandwich.

"Sorry," he said. "But c'mon Rach. You know she's right."

"You both just have exceedingly small minds," Rachel shrugged. "I would have loved to be named Eponine."

"Yeah, but Rach, that's you," Finn argued. "And Raoul sounds like some kind of rat or something," he added.

"You take that back!" Rachel shrieked, causing some of the other patrons of the diner to glance over. Quinn covered her face with her hand.

"You are both so embarrassing," she laughed.

"Not nearly as embarrassing as having the name Eponine would be," Finn retorted.

"I hate you both so much."


	13. We Just Happened

With the ending of September came the ending of Rachel's second trimester. The hardest parts were over, and she was very nearly in the home stretch. With every day that passed she felt more and more like a beluga whale, but everyone assured her she looked fine. They were rehearsing endlessly for the invitational's that would be held on the evening of October 13th. The new addition of Sam had been a great asset to the team, and rumors were flying that Kurt was often seen making passes and trying to seduce him. Rachel and Angela would have weekly phone calls, and Angela's information was always the same: Jesse was in a relationship with a girl named Evelyn Mayer. His profile was a picture of them sitting together at a booth at an open mic night, grinning from ear to ear. Although Rachel had never seen the photo herself, she was sure the girl was beautiful, and when her heart would sink too low, the baby would begin to kick to assure mother that it was okay.

Invitationals were upon them before they were even ready. It had already been a month since her last sonogram, and Rachel felt enormous in the costumes Mercedes had designed. They would perform two numbers: "Viva La Vida" and a medly of "Down," and "Knock You Down" after Mercedes had complained and complained that the performances were always too Vanilla. Rachel was working on her vocal warm ups with Brad when she felt her cell phone vibrate in her pocket. Excusing herself, she flipped open the phone to find a text message from an unfamiliar number.

"Break a Leg :-) " it read. Rachel narrowed her eyes and threw the phone in her bag as Mr. Schue rushed into the room.

"Guys, the house is packed. This is great. Everyone knows that now that Vocal Adrenaline has lost is oomph, we're the team to watch. Everyone get pumped!" he grinned, clasping his hands together.

Viva La Vida was met with enthusiastic reactions. By the end of the song, everyone was on their feet, and Rachel was beaming. The baby was kicking in response to the thunderous applause, and Rachel laughed, tears welling in her eyes as she rushed offstage for the costume and set change.

"Okay guys," Mercedes said as she teased out her hair, "You have got to find your inner R&B star for this song. If we have one person who looks out of place, we all look out of place," She said, glancing at Kurt.

"Why are you looking at me? You have to pick on me," he complained, putting his hands up. Everyone laughed.

"I'm serious though. Puck, Finn, this is your chance for the return of Pucky Puck and Finny D. Tina, bring back that Katy Perry vibe, only think more along the lines of California Girls. Quinn…uh…just try your best," Mercedes jested, causing Quinn to laugh. "Artie I don't even need to say anything to you, man, you got this. Mike, we definitely need that pop and lock tonight. And Rachel," she said, looking in the girl's eyes, "I watched you dry hump Finn in front of the entire high school singing Salt n Pepa. You know what you're doing," she laughed. They put their hands in excitedly, shouting "New Directions" as loud as they possibly could.

They hurried onstage, taking their places in the dark, and as the lights and music came up, Rachel let her inner wild child run free. She laughed and allowed herself to enjoy performing such an outrageous song. When Artie took front and center for his rap solo, she joined the rest of the girls dancing around him.

"_Down like she supposed to be,  
She gets down low for me,  
Down like her temperature, 'cause to me she zero degrees.  
She cold, overfreeze,  
I got that girl from overseas,  
Now she my miss America,  
Now can I be her soldier please?  
I'm fighting for this girl,  
On the battlefield of love,  
Don't it look like baby cupid sent his arrows from above?  
Don't you ever leave the side of me,  
Indefinitely, not probably,  
And honestly I'm down like the economy, ARTIE!" _he shouted at the end of his solo. He had been beaming at Tina throughout the entire thing, and they now danced together.

The audience was jamming along with the Glee club, Rachel swore she saw Miss Pillsbury in the font row doing an adorable little dance. As the boys continued to sing the refrain from "Down," Matt came in and provided the transition to "Knock You Down," which Mr. Schuester had written in perfectly, with Mercedes' help.

"_Keep rockin', and keep knockin'  
Whether you Louis Vuitton it up or Reebokin'  
You see the hate, that they're servin' on a platter  
So what we gon' have, dessert or disaster?" _Mercedes high fived him and continued to sing the female verse.

"_I never thought I'd be in love like this,  
When I look at you my mind goes on a trip.  
Then you came in, and knocked me on my face,  
Feels like in I'm a race  
But I already won first place." _She stepped backwards as Santana took a step forwards, pushing her long black hair behind her shoulders and taking a sexy pose as she sang.

"_I never thought I'd fall for you as hard as I did  
You got me thinkin' bout our life, our house, and kids.  
Every mornin' I look at you and smile  
'Cause boy you came around and you knocked me down,  
Knocked me down." _The group continued their dance moves throughout the chorus, and Puck took center stage for his lines.

"_I never thought I'd, hear myself say, ooh, ya'll go ahead  
I think I'm gonna kick it wit my girl today, kick it with my girl today.  
I used to be commander and chief  
Of my pimp ship flyin' high  
Till I met this pretty little missile that shot me out the sky,"_ Puck finished up, smirking to the ladies in the audience. There were several squeals, and Rachel couldn't help but laugh. Kurt and Sam took the step forward, with Sam starting out. Although he was skinny and exceptionally white, Rachel had to admit that he had a stage persona that fit the lyrics perfectly.

"_Hey, so now I'm crashing, don't know how it happened  
But I know it feels so good.  
Said if I could back, and make it happen faster  
Don't you know I would baby if I could," _Sam finished up, looking at Kurt with a smile.

"_He's independent, to the fullest, the load never too much  
He helpin' me pull it  
He shot the bullet that ended that life  
I swear to you the pimp in me just died tonight," _Kurt beamed at his vocal partner and they took hands, stepping back so that they were all in a general line for the chorus. Finn stepped nervously forward for his solo part. Rachel caught his eye and gave him an encouraging smile, and he nodded, sliding into his spot, the Finny D. persona back in place.

"_Tell me now can you make it past your Caspers  
So we can finally fly off into NASA?"_ suddenly, completely unlike the choreography they had rehearsed, he spun and grabbed Quinn's hand, pulling her forward. She glared at him warningly, then put her best showface on. Rachel shook her head, Quinn's showface was genuinely terrible, but Rachel was more interested in Finn's motives for breaking choreography. As she listened to him sing…well, speak, since he was a terrible rapper, the words, her heart began to melt. Was he truly doing what she assumed?

"_You was always the cheerleader of my dreams that  
Seemed to only date the head of football teams," _ He pointed to himself, and a few of the audience members laughed. _  
"And I was the class clown that, always kept you laughin'  
We, were never meant to be, baby, we just happened,"_ he said, pushing her hair behind her ear. Quinn was rapidly turning pink, but she wore a bright smile.

"_So please, don't mess up the trick.  
Hey young world I'm the new slick rick.  
They say I move too quick, but we can't let this moment pass us  
Let the hourglass pass right into ashes.  
Let the wind blow the ash right before my glasses.  
So I wrote this love letter right before my classes.  
How could a goddess ask, someone that's only average  
For advice, OMG, you listen to that…" _he trailed off, and they all put a hand to their mouths as they had rehearsed.

"_Woe is me, baby this is tragic  
'Cause we had it, we was magic  
I was flyin', now I'm crashin'  
This is bad, real bad, Michael Jackson.  
Now I'm mad, real mad, Joe Jackson  
You should leave your boyfriend now, I'mma ask him,_" he finished, grabbing Quinn's hand and pulling her back towards the group as the audience broke out in applause. Quinn, however, shook her head. She had exchanged a glance with Rachel, who had vehemently nodded her head—they had switched verses. Finn raised an eyebrow, confused as to why she wouldn't return to the line, but when she opened her mouth, he wore a smile that no one in Glee club had seen for months.

"_Say you gotta put the good with the bad, happy and the sad  
So will you bring a better future than I had in the past?  
Oh cause, I don't wanna make the same mistakes I did.  
I don't wanna fall back on my face again.  
Whoa, whoa, I'll admit it, I was scared to answer love's call,  
Whoa, whoa, and if it hits better make it worth the fall,"_ Quinn beamed, while the rest of the club finished up the song. As the last chords echoed through the auditorium, Finn took a deep breath and kissed Quinn in the middle of the stage. The club echoed the joyful applause from the audience, with Artie whistling and Mercedes shouting "Get it girl!" Rachel was laughing, and even Puck had to smile.

Microphones still on, Finn hugged her tightly to him.

"I love you Quinn," he said, his admittance echoing throughout the room. There were squeals of excitement from several girls throughout the audience, and Quinn laughed.

"I love you too, Finn," she said, tears running down her cheeks.

Rachel put a hand on her stomach and smiled. This was the kind of reunion she and Jesse needed: the epic kind, with music…and a cheering audience.

Changing out of her costume, she rushed to the lobby, anxious to hear her dads' opinions on the performance.

"Rachel…" a woman's voice said. Rachel spun to find Shelby.

"What are you doing here?" she asked, backing away slightly. Shelby stepped forward.

"I wanted to see your performance…see you. Check up on you, see how you were, " Shelby explained. "You were wonderful up there," she nodded towards the auditorium. "How far along are you?" she asked, motioning to Rachel's belly.

"28 weeks," she said, still wary of her mother's visit. "Where's Beth?"

"I left her with a sitter," Shelby explained. "She never sits still for performances," Shelby laughed. "You look great, Rachel. You really do," Shelby smiled. Suddenly, Rachel took her mother's hand and placed it on her belly as the baby began kicking. Shelby looked at her daughter in amazement, laughing. "It's kicking!" she laughed. Rachel nodded, smiling. They looked at one another for a moment, and Rachel straightened, uncomfortable.

"I should go, my dads are waiting," she explained. Shelby nodded.

"Of course," she smiled. "It was wonderful to see you Rachel," she added. Rachel nodded and began to walk away, then spun.

"Sh…Mom?" she called.

"Yes?"

"If you had kept me, what would you have named me?" Rachel asked, biting her lip. Shelby laughed and looked at the tile floor of the lobby. Finally, she looked up to her daughter's eyes.

"Maria," she responded. "I loved West Side Story."


	14. What Are Friends For

Word of Finn and Quinn's reunion spread like wildfire around McKinley High. Even Sue Sylvester had congratulated the blonde on "finally getting her boyfriend back," and the school newspaper had interviewed the lovebirds on overcoming the obstacles for true love. For Rachel, the days were long and tedious. Walking the halls of school, she felt as though everyone was staring at her. Even Glee rehearsals were more difficult because of her expanding waistline.

"Think of it this way," Mercedes suggested as they made their way through the lunch line one day. "You only have two months of this left!" she stated brightly.

"Yeah, and then she has to decide what the hell she's doing with it," Kurt added. Tina, Mercedes, and Rachel narrowed their eyes at him, and he rolled his. "I'm always the bad guy! Honestly…"

She was standing at her locker when Finn nearly skipped over, looking incredibly thrilled about something. Rachel raised an eyebrow.

"What's up Finn?" she asked.

"Dude, Rachel, I just got the best idea ever. What if we like, continued the Journey tradition at the next Regionals? Like could you imagine?" he began to play an awful air guitar and headbang. _"Someday love will find you, break those chains that bind you. One night will remind you how we touched and went our separate ways. If he ever hurts you, true love won't desert you. You know I still love you, though we touched and went our separate ways!" _He continued playing air guitar down the hallway, and Rachel shook her head. Quinn walked out of the girl's bathroom and her gaze followed her boyfriend down the hall. He was still singing his guitar part, and as he reached the end of the hall, he did a terrible guitar jump. Quinn approached Rachel.

"What is that about?" she asked. Rachel giggled.

"He thinks he's Steve Perry."

The beginning of November found Rachel completely exhausted from Glee and the baby. She had decided to take a day off, and Quinn responded to this as though it were the worst idea ever.

"Rachel! You can't skip!" she pleaded. The brunette rolled her eyes.

"Really, I think you guys will get along just fine without me," she said. Quinn shook her head.

"No! We need you!" Quinn begged. "Please?"

Heaving a sigh, Rachel nodded.

"Fine. You owe me."

As Rachel and Quinn walked from one end of the school towards the choir room, Quinn was exceptionally distracted with her phone. Rachel raised an eyebrow.

"Really, you can't wait the three minutes to see Finn?" she teased. Quinn rolled her eyes.

"This is important," she explained. Rachel shrugged, and they continued their journey. They walked into the choir room, and Rachel was stunned. A large banner hung across the windows that read, "Congratulations Rachel," and a cake sat on a table in the middle of the room.

"Surprise!" they yelled, and Rachel found herself face to face with the Glee club, Lauren Zises and the other AV nerds, and her fathers.

"What is this?" Rachel asked in shock. Mercedes grinned.

"We threw you a baby shower!" she explained. Rachel laughed.

"Everything is yellow, as much as I detest that color," Kurt explained, motioning to the large pile of presents on the piano.

"Who wants cake?" Mr. Schue asked, holding up a large knife.

"You know I do," Mercedes said, with Finn right behind her.

"Mr. Schue thought we needed a break," Quinn said to Rachel's overwhelmed expression. Tina handed her a piece of cake, and Sam sat on his feet eagerly.

"I want her to open presents!" he said. Kurt laughed and sat next to him.

"No she needs the big present first!" Finn hissed. "But let me finish my cake!"

After Finn had shoved cake down his face, the group assembled into their usual triangle formation on the risers. Rachel, her dads, and the AV club sat in chairs that were facing the group, with Rachel front and center. She was beaming, both hands around her belly.

"Rachel, we know the past few months for you haven't been very easy," Mercedes began. "Finding out you were pregnant was probably the most horrific moment of your life to date. But I told you once that Glee Club would be your family, and we're going to stick to that promise."

"Rachel, if you had told me at this time last year that you and I would have bonded and become friends, I probably would have slushied you in the face," Quinn said honestly. "But I am so unbelievably lucky that you and I are close now. If you keep it, this baby will have an amazing mom, but no matter what you decide, we'll be here for you."

"Rachel, I can't thank you enough for showing me the light and making me realize how good I had it with Quinn," Finn smiled. "You really do care about everyone else before you care about yourself, no matter how much of a drama queen you say you are."

"Rachel, your friends in the Glee club have been staying extra hours to work on this little number for you. We love you Rachel. You've always been the mother of the Glee club, and now, you're going to be the mother of an amazingly talented little baby," Mr. Schuester said, turning to conduct Brad and the choir. When he played the opening line to "That's What Friends are For," Rachel began to bawl. The group did very simplistic swaying choreography, and Quinn began the song.

"_And I never thought I'd feel this way  
And as far as I'm concerned  
I'm glad I got the chance to say  
That I do believe I love you,"_ she trailed off, becoming choked up, as Mercedes stepped in on the second part.

"_And if I should ever go away  
Well, then close your eyes and try to feel  
The way we do today,  
And then if you can remember," _she finished as the rest of the club came in on the ever so memorable chorus.

"_Keep smilin', keep shinin'  
Knowin' you can always count on me, for sure.  
That's what friends are for.  
For good times and bad times  
I'll be on your side forever more.  
That's what friends are for." _The group continued to sway, while Finn took lead on the next verses.

"_Well, you came and opened me,  
And now there's so much more I see.  
And so by the way, I thank you.  
And then for the times when we're apart,  
Well, then close your eyes and know  
These words are comin' from my heart,  
And then if you can remember…" _Finn finished. As they sang the chorus three more times, they had wrapped Rachel up in a huge bear hug, tears rolling down her face. Kurt had kissed her on the cheek, and even Santana had hugged her.

"You guys are so amazing," she said when the song came to a close.

"We love you Rachel Berry!" Tina and Artie grinned.

"And Berry to Be!" Kurt exclaimed.

"She should open presents now!"

After receiving more stuffed animals and gender-neutral onezies than she could shake a stick at, Rachel was feeling overwhelmed. Where was she going to put all of these things in the house?

"There's one more thing, Rachel," Mr. Schuester said, and her dads handed her a small photo album filled with pictures of a nursery from a magazine. As she continued to flip through the book, she realized that the pictures weren't from a magazine at all, but it was the guest room in her own house.

"Dad? Daddy?" she said incredulously. They beamed.

"Only the best for our grandbaby!" Leroy said. Rachel jumped up to hug them both

"It should be furnished by the time we get home today," Hiram said. "We've been having it done while you've been at school," he explained, "And we've had to pray that you'd have no reason to go into the guest room." He and Leroy laughed.

"I don't know what to say," Rachel laughed.

"Let's play baby bingo!" Kurt handed her a piece of paper and some chips. "All those nights at the home with Gram better come in handy!"

Hiram and Leroy carried the presents up to the nursery, and Rachel took her first steps into the room of her soon to be child.

"Rachel, sweetie, we're going to go pick up dinner," Hiram said to her through the doorframe.

"Okay!" she shouted back. She walked to her room and pulled the second sonogram from her desk drawer, then walked back to the nursery. "It's all going to be worth it when you're here, isn't it?" she spoke to the baby. "All this pain that your daddy put me through…it's gonna go away when I see your face, right?" she gently stroked the piece of paper. Taking a deep breath, she pulled out her cell phone, scrolled down to the J's, and pressed send on Jesse's contact.

Holding her breath, she heard the phone ring once, twice thr—

"Hello, St. James?" he answered, as though he were still laughing from the tail-end of something funny. Rachel couldn't breathe. "Hello? Who is this?"

"Jesse?" Rachel squeaked. There was a moment of silence, and then a click. Rachel's eyes filled up with tears. Of course, what had she expected? He had a new life now. Silently, she put her phone away and looked once more at the sonogram photo. "I hope you don't remind me of him too much," she said with a sigh.


	15. Don't Lose Heart

One freezing November afternoon as Rachel curled up on the couch wrapped in a giant sweater, she heard her text message alert. She checked her phone, and giggled at Andrea.

"Majorly important. Call if you can. I might die. Not literally. But you know what I mean. CALL ME." Rachel shook her head and hit the callback button on the text. The phone had barely hit one ring when Andrea picked up excitedly.

"RACHEL BERRY," she shrieked.

"Yes?" Rachel laughed.

"THEY BROKE UP," she yelled into the receiver. Rachel held the phone away from her ear.

"What?" she asked, to be sure she heard her right.

"They broke up! Jesse and Evelyn! I guess it was pretty nasty too, like she wasn't loyal or something, idk. I'm only getting all this from profile updates. But this is great news!" Andrea sounded so elated. Rachel just shook her head.

"Oh Andrea, that ship has sailed," Rachel said.

"What are you talking about?" she asked.

"I called him last week."

"YOU WHAT?"

"Calm down, calm down. Okay, basically my friends threw me a baby shower and I was depressed so I thought maybe by some crazy chance he would answer. And he did, but clearly only because he's deleted my number and didn't recognize it. And I was so stupid, all I could do was mumble his name, and he hung up as soon as he figured out who it was."

"Ohmigod. Rachel. What if you made them break up?"

"What?" Rachel asked, confused.

"Think about it. He heard your voice and all the feelings he had just came flooding back!"

"You're worse than I am," Rachel laughed.

"No but seriously! What if this could happen after all, Rachel?"

"But it won't," Rachel assured her. "Look, two more months and I have this baby as though it were just an act of god and there was no father, and my dads will help me raise it and I can live life like I was supposed to," she said.

"I don't get you, Rachel Berry."

"I don't think anyone does," Rachel admitted.

Rehearsals for Sectionals had become more persistant and more intense. Rachel could tell that Mr. Schue was frustrated having to choreograph numbers for his lead female where she wasn't doing a lot of dancing, and she attempted to reciprocate by putting her heart and soul into singing, but even that was wearing her thin.

"Guys, where is your heart?" he asked them as they sat, drained, on the April Rhodes Civic Pavillion stage.

"Mr. Schue, we've been working nonstop for three weeks!" Tina cried, her head in Mercedes' lap. Artie nodded.

"Yeah, Mr. Schue, I'm gonna need replacement wheels!" Mr. Schuester looked to Rachel for support, but she was guzzling water out of a plastic water bottle.

"Guys, you can't just give up because you're tired!" Finn argued, standing next to Mr. Schue. "What happened to the whole "Don't Stop Believin'" mojo that we had for so long?"

"It's taking a nap," Kurt said from his position face down on the stage. Finn rolled his eyes and looked to Quinn for help, but she just shrugged innocently.

"So that's it? We have a month to go, and we're all just giving up?" Finn asked. Rachel rolled her eyes and sat up.

"We're not giving up, Finn. We're just exhausted! We want this just as much as you do—"

"Yeah but nobody can handle the nazi boot camp. It feels like Vocal Adrenaline," Puck said. There was a tenseness that was palpable as Rachel fidgeted awkwardly. She was fully aware of how silly it was to still hold a grudge against the school when no one that had personally wronged her was still in attendance, but a searing hatred spread through her body at the mere mention of the facility. It didn't help that every day since Andrea's phone call Rachel had found herself staring at her cell for hours, debating on calling him once more.

"Guys, come on," Mr. Schue yelled, snapping her out of her reverie. "Sectionals is in a month!" Mr. Schue ran his hands through his hair. Rachel looked at him, smiled, and nodded. She sprang to her feet as best she could, and looked at her club members.

"Mr. Schue is right. We can't lose heart now. I know we're exhausted, but we just need to pull through!" Kurt began to laugh, and Rachel scowled at him.

"I'm sorry Rachel but you don't know how funny you look giving us this speech with a huge baby belly," he said, attempting to stifle his giggles. Quinn was the next one to begin to chuckle, followed by Tina, Mercedes, Mike, and Artie. Soon thereafter, Puck, Matt, Sam, Brittany, and Santana continued suit, leaving Finn, Rachel, and Mr. Schue to look at one another desperately. Finally, Rachel and Finn smiled at one another, and the club was laughing hysterically.

"Okay guys," Mr. Schue said when he had controlled his giggles, "From the top."


	16. Mission Impossible

They had a costume fitting that Friday. Quinn helped Rachel zip up the dress and tie the bow in the back, and Rachel was surprised as to how well it hid her bump.

The girls walked out of the bathrooms and back into the choir room, Quinn and Rachel twirling in excitement. The boys clapped and whistled, while Tina and Mercedes trailed behind, Santana and Brittany entering last, pinkies linked.

"Wow, girls, you look fabulous!" Mr. Schue said, gesturing to them. Mercedes put a hand on her hip.

"Mr. Schue, just once, could we wear dresses to a competition that aren't all high wasted? They do not flatter my curvalicious figure at all," Mercedes complained as she brushed the skirt of her navy dress. Brittany nodded.

"Yeah, Mr. Schue. They make us look pregnant."

There was a moment of silence as everyone sucked in a breath, looking to Rachel. Brittany shrugged.

"Sorry Rachel," she said. Rachel swallowed and looked to the floor.

"It's okay Brittany…" she said, attempting to smile. Mr. Schue stepped in.

"Girls, these are the only dresses that will best suit everyone's body type, okay?" he explained. Santana rolled her eyes.

"We look like sailors."

"I like them," Finn offered. Kurt stood.

"I think it's the bow," he said. "Can we maybe get it in a different color? White is just so…blah. Maybe something that would pop, like a hot pink?"

"But the guys' ties are white," Mr. Schue explained.

"No way in hell am I wearing a pink tie," Puck interrupted. Mr. Schue put up his hands in defense. Kurt frowned.

"What about lime green?" he suggested. Mike and Matt exchanged glances, while Puck shrugged.

"As long as it's not pink." Mr. Schue put a hand on his hips.

"But we have three weeks until Sectionals. I can't mail the ties back and expect the others to get here in time. And as for sashes, I have _no _idea how to do that," Mr. Schue ran another hand through his hair. Kurt put up a hand.

"Mr. Schue. I've got this," he turned back to the girls. "Jo-Wall fabrics. Men's Dress Outlet. My car. Fifteen minutes," he said curtly before picking up his bag and heading for the door.

With Kurt and Sam in the front seats, Mercedes, Rachel, and Tina squeezed in the back of the SUV. They were listening to showtunes (of which only Kurt, Rachel, and Sam knew the lyrics) and laughing widely. When Kurt plugged in his iPod shuffle and, "No Good Deed" came blaring through the speakers, Rachel began to laugh.

"Guys, did I ever tell you the story of how this is the first song the baby ever responded to?"

"No!" Kurt said, slamming the brake and looking towards her. "This baby is bound for Broadway," he said excitedly as the other cars began to honk. "OH SHUT YOUR PIEHOLE, LADY WITH A BABY," he shouted out the window. Rachel laughed.

"She called me!" Mercedes grinned proudly. Rachel laughed.

"Yeah, I had just gotten to this part," she said, nodding to the song, "and this little one started kicking up a storm," she laughed. As the song ended they pulled into the parking lot of the Men's Dress Outlet.

"I figured we should get the ties first and match fabric to ties," Kurt explained as he hopped out of the car and threw his bag over his shoulder, extending one arm to Sam and one arm to Mercedes. Rachel and Tina glanced at one another and began to laugh, and the five of them raced into the store.

"Hello how can I h—KURT!" an older man said from behind a rack of clothes. "Oh god, Kurt, it's been _ages _since you've stopped by, I absolutely _must _show you the latest that we've got in—"

"No time Tobias," Kurt said, holding up his hand. "I'm on a mission. Lime green ties. Tina, you brought the dress?" Tina nodded. "Excellent." Kurt began searching through the racks of ties, and brought 14 shades of lime green to the counter where Tina had laid out the dress. "No. No. No. Disgusting. No." he said, throwing the ties over his shoulder when he discarded them from the competition. "Aha!" he said, holding up the tie and dress. "Ladies—Sam…what do we think?"

"I like it!" Rachel beamed. Mercedes raised an eyebrow.

"You're telling me that tie is different from the last seven that you looked at?" Kurt rolled his eyes.

"Tobias, I need eight of these ties, stat," he smiled, batting his eyelashes. Within minutes, the man had the ties packaged up and handed to Kurt.

"Can I help you with anything else, Kurt?" he asked. Kurt smiled politely.

"No thanks, we're in a bit of a rush," he explained, handing the man money that Mr. Schue had given him. They hurried out of the store, and Mercedes smiled.

"He was nice," she said. Kurt shrugged.

"I guess so. He talks like he has a potato in his mouth," he said as they piled back in the car. "Next stop, Jo-Wall's."

The workers at the fabric and craft store were overwhelmed when five overexcited teenagers came bounding through the front doors. They split up, with Kurt and Sam heading for the remnants, Rachel and Tina for clearance, and Mercedes to the regular fabrics. "Silk ladies, or at least something like it!" Kurt warned as they split.

Rachel was digging through racks of discontinued fabric, holding things out to show Tina, when a voice behind her made the hair on the back of her neck stand up.

"Berry?" the female voice sneered. Rachel needn't even turn around, she could pick out that snoot from anywhere—Giselle. "C'mon Berry, we know it's you," she laughed, and Rachel heard agreement from at least two other people. Tina looked at Rachel warningly, but Rachel just shook her head, looking over her shoulder carefully. There they were, Giselle and four other members of Vocal Adrenaline. Rachel pulled her coat around her tighter and held the fabric in front of her stomach. "How cute, you guys are still competing? We thought we crushed every hope you ever had!" Giselle cackled evilly. Rachel swallowed.

"No, we're just coming back even stronger this year," she replied confidently. Giselle looked at her teammates and laughed.

"You guys are cute. We're an unstoppable force, so even if you guys win your little Sectionals competition, there's no hope for you at Regionals." She put a hand on her hip. "How's your heart, Berry?" she asked. Rachel threw down the bolt of fabric.

"Screw you guys!" she shouted, but Vocal Adrenaline was no longer paying attention to her words. Rachel looked down suddenly at her stomach, then back up to Giselle.

"Are you _pregnant _Berry?" Giselle asked in disbelief.

"Leave her alone!" Tina warned meekly, but she was ignored as the husky dancer stepped forward.

"You're actually pregnant. I can't believe any man would dream of touching you, let alone…" she gave an exaggerated shudder. Rachel rolled her eyes.

"Who's the father Berry?" another member of Vocal Adrenaline asked from the back row. Giselle rolled her eyes to face the girl.

"It's obviously that mammoth kid she always sings with. Aww, isn't that cute. Bigfoot and the yeti, having a baby," she teased, spinning to face Rachel once more. There was a chorus of "Aww"'s from the rest of Vocal Adrenaline, and Rachel fought back tears.

"It's Jesse's," she mumbled quietly. Giselle smirked.

"What was that Berry? Speak up, we can't hear you." Taking a deep breath, Rachel looked directly in Giselle's eyes.

"It's Jesse's," she said defiantly. There were a few gasp's of horror, while Giselle's triumphant face fell. For the first time in her life, she was speechless.

"Clearly she's lying," another member suggested. Giselle nodded.

"Yeah," she said, finding her voice, "It's probably not even real," she sneered.

"Oh really?" Rachel asked, lifting her shirt so that her stomach was visible. With another few gasp's, Giselle blinked carefully.

"Doesn't mean it's Jesse's," she said pointedly.

"Look, you don't have to believe it, he doesn't either. But I know the truth, and I know that we're going to beat you in the spring," Rachel said, hand on her hip. She spun to leave, but then smirked and looked back towards Giselle. "And by the way, that dress is really ugly," she said before grabbing Tina's arm and walking confidently away.

"Oh my god, Rachel, that was awesome!" Tina said excitedly as they left Vocal Adrenaline behind them. Rachel laughed.

"I don't' know what came over me, I just…" she looked down to her stomach. "No one talks about my baby and gets away with it," she giggled.

"So what have we found?" Kurt asked when he saw the girls approaching.

"That Rachel's a bad ass!" Tina grinned. "She stood up to Vocal Adrenaline like, hardcore." Mercedes looked at Rachel in surprise.

"They're here?" Kurt asked.

"A few of them," Rachel explained. "And it was nothing…they saw the baby, that's all."

"Girl, I don't know what I would do if I was you, all this Vocal Adrenaline, Jesse, baby hulabaloo," Mercedes complemented. Rachel giggled.

"FOUND IT!" Kurt shrieked from the bottom of a rack of fabric.

"You found a matching green?"

"Oh no, I've been looking for something to trim my costume for Tango."

"You take Tango lessons?"

"It helps me stay fit."


	17. Moving Forward

With two weeks to go, nerves were beginning to take over. Rachel was officially in month number eight, and everyone's eyes were on her, remembering how early Quinn had gone into labor. Every rehearsal that passed without Rachel having contractions was in itself a little miracle, and Andrea called every day to assure that her friend had yet to have the baby.

"Andrea, I'm _fine, _really. I don't think that baby will be coming any time soon, I promise."

"Well you have to call me the **moment **you go into labor. I come home from school on the 20th of December," Andrea explained.

"Well I'm not due until January 5th, so I think we're fine," Rachel laughed. "Oh boo, you won't be home for Sectionals, Rachel said disappointedly.

"When are they?"

"December 17th," she said, glancing at her calendar. Andrea sounded incredibly disappointed.

"Well I'm sure you'll rock the house. I really wish I could be there!" she complained. Rachel laughed.

"Well you know I'll call you when we get results, right?"

"You better, or I'll be coming for you when I get back!" Rachel laughed. There was a bit of a silence, and Rachel took a deep breath.

"Is he—"

"He's still single," they said at he same time. The girls laughed, and Rachel put a hand on her stomach.

"I ran into Giselle at Jo Wall Fabrics two weeks ago," she said suddenly. Andrea made a sound of disgust.

"Oh man I hate that girl. She got so cocky when she was promoted after I left," she growled. Rachel giggled.

"She saw the baby."

"Oh shit. Did she say anything?"

"She made a few assumptions, pretty much said I was a whore…and then I admitted that it was Jesse's," Rachel said sheepishly. Andrea made a choking noise.

"WHAT?"

"You have _got _to stop yelling into the phone."

"Sorry," Andrea mumbled. "But you told them the baby was Jesse's?"

"I had to! She called Finn bigfoot and I'd had it up to here so I just…exploded."

"Do you think she's going to tell him?"

Rachel stopped dead; she hadn't even considered that a possibility. She pondered for a moment, and then took a breath.

"I doubt it. They're really focused on Sectionals right now, and I doubt she even still has his number," Rachel reasoned.

"Facebook," Andrea said simply. Rachel cleared her throat.

"Listen, I don't think Giselle cares enough about either of us to feel it necessary to interfere, and if she does, maybe it's for the best," Rachel assured both Andrea and herself.

"You are way too confident in people," Andrea teased.

For club pictures that year, Mr. Schue had them wear the newly designed Kurt Hummel limited edition costumes (or at least, that's what Kurt called them). The boys enjoyed the green ties, and the girls enjoyed the new design much more than the original. The stood in their usual formation for pictures, each student wearing a bright, confident smile. Suddenly, Rachel was struck with a shocking realization. From now until the end of eternity, people would look at her pictures in the Thunderclap and remember that she had been pregnant. They wouldn't remember her voice, or her talent, or even her compulsive need to be right all the time; they would remember that she had a baby. After pictures, Rachel quickly walked out of the Glee room so that no one would notice her tears, but Quinn followed her down the hall and into the bathroom.

"Rachel?' she called softly. She heard a soft crying from a stall, and knocked on the door. "Rachel?" she said again.

"Go away," she said, sniffing.

"Rachel, what's going on? Is it the baby?"

"No."

"Then what's wrong?" Quinn was leaning on the stall door, and lost her balance for a moment as it flew open. Rachel sat on the toilet, her eyes red.

"I can't do this Quinn."

"What are you talking about?" Quinn asked, kneeling to be eye level with her friend.

"People are never going to remember me for who I was. They're only going to remember this baby."

"That is not true, Rachel. Everyone knows you for your voice—"

"But what good is that going to do me? I have a responsibility now, Quinn. I had everything, and it's gone now," the girl began to weep again, and Quinn laughed bitterly.

"Rachel, you don't have to tell me what that's like," she said. Rachel looked away, embarrassed. "But I can promise you, from experience, that it gets better. You are going to be a star, Rachel Berry. I know it, we all know it," Rachel laughed. "Now please get off the toilet before you ruin the dress for Sectionals," Quinn teased.


	18. This Is It

The morning of Sectionals, Rachel Berry hopped from her bed as best as she could, had a large breakfast, and kissed her dads goodbye.

"I'll see you at the performance!" she squealed. She heard Quinn's honk from the driveway, and skipped out to the car, costume in a garment bag and shoes in a backpack. Her hair was carefully curled, and she had applied a generous amount of makeup. The girls excitedly drove to the High School, hurrying into the parking lot. They piled onto the bus and sat in pairs, and finally, Mr. Schue and Miss Pillsbury got on. The club burst into applause, and Mr. Schue bowed.

"Thank you, thank you," he laughed. "Everyone's here, right?"

"Mr. Schue, can't we just go!" Mercedes urged. "I'm so excited I might die!"

"All right, all right. Just let me say one thing. No matter what happens today—"

"You're proud of us!" the club finished. Mr. Schue laughed, sat down next to Miss Pillsbury, and off they went.

"Who are we competing against?" Rachel asked as they walked into the theatre. Artie opened a program.

"Bogaloo Beats, from Dayton, and Crisp Criscendos from Toledo," he read. Rachel took a deep breath.

"Sounds good."

"We're first," Artie panicked, looking up. Rachel put on a confident smile.

"Well then we'd better start getting dressed!" she grinned as they went towards the dressing rooms.

The lights were down in the crowded theatre. Mr. Schue sat in his seat next to Miss Pillsbury, watching as his students found their places in the dark. She reached for his hand, and smiled.

"Break a leg," she told him, beaming, and he laughed. He watched a soft, purple light come up on his students and smiled, he was thrilled that Lauren Zises and her AV friends had volunteered to do the lights for the performance. He listened as Brad played a piano intro, and held his breath as Finn took center stage.

"_Waking up  
In the midday sun  
What's to live for?  
You could see what I've done  
Staring at emotion  
In the light of day  
I was hiding  
From the things that you'd say,"_ he stood in the center of the stage, lit in purple, the rest of the club with their backs toward the audience. He continued, with Brad and an acoustic guitar still the only source of music.

"_We are not what you think we are.  
We are golden, we are golden,"_ Finn continued. Suddenly, the rest of the group spun and joined him, lights coming up on all their faces, and illuminating the rest of the band that was hidden behind Brad's piano.

"_We are not what you think we are  
We are golden, we are golden,"_ they shouted more than sang, and the band picked up and joined in on the refrain, each member of the group doing the choreography they had extensively rehearsed time and time again.

"_Teenage dreams in a teenage circus  
Running around like a clown on purpose.  
Who gives a damn about the family you come from?  
No giving up when you're young and you want some," _they sang. Brittany, Tina, and Santana went to one side of the stage, with Matt, Sam, and Mike on the opposite, and they began running back and forth through each other as the next piece of the song came up.

"_Running around again,  
Running from running.  
Running around again,  
Running from running,"_ the group sang. Rachel felt a sharp pain in her lower abdomen, but pushed through. These were the big leagues, she didn't have time for baby pains. Kurt broke through the line of people running

"_I was a boy  
At an open door.  
Why you staring?  
Do you still think that you know?  
Looking for treasure  
In the things that you threw  
Like a magpie,  
I live for glitter, not you,"_ he pointed to the audience, then danced to the back of the group as Artie came forward.

"_We are not what you think we are  
We are golden, we are golden,"_ he sang, looking to his groupmates to back him up.

"_We are not what you think we are.  
We are golden, we are golden!"_ they sang.

"_Teenage dreams in a teenage circus,  
Running around like a clown on purpose.  
Who gives a damn about the family you come from?  
No giving up when you're young and you want some." _Rachel stood in the middle of the stage, the rest of the group continuing the spins and partnered moves.

"_Now I'm sitting alone,  
I'm finally looking around.  
Left here on my own,  
I'm gonna hurt myself.  
Maybe losing my mind,  
I'm still wondering why.  
Had to let the world, let it bleed me dry,"_ she lifted her arms to the sky.

"_We are not what you think we are,"_ the boys whispered, followed by the girls repeating the line in the same fashion.

"_We are not what you think we are."_

"_We are not what you think we are  
We are golden, we are golden!"_ New Directions shouted, fist pumping the air.

"_Teenage dreams in a teenage circus  
Running around like a clown on purpose  
Who gives a damn about the family you come from  
No giving up when you're young and you want some!"_ they all threw their hands up in the air, and the trios took their places on the sides of the stage again.

"_Running around again,  
Running from running.  
Running around again,  
Running from running." _ Everyone made a straight line across the stage, and looked directly to the back of the theatre, speaking to every person in the audience.

"_We are not what you think we are,  
We are golden, we are golden!" _they whispered, then Puck stepped forward.

"_We are not what you think we are,  
We are golden, we are gold!" _he sang, spiking to a high note on the last, while the rest of the group stood purposefully in a line.

"_We are not what you think we are,  
We are golden, we are golden!" _they finished at full volume, the theatre breaking into thunderous applause. A wide smile was on everyone's faces, and they couldn't help but take a moment to soak it all in before taking their places for the next performance.

Finn brought four standing microphones center stage, while the lavaliers the rest of the group wore were turned down. Members of the McKinley High Jazz band continued to sit behind Brad at the piano, while Finn, Artie, and Kurt stood in a row behind the solitary microphone. Rachel locked eyes with Mercedes. She was finally, finally getting her chance to shine, and Rachel beamed. Mercedes took a deep breath and walked up to the microphone. She nodded slightly to Brad, who conducted a large brass intro from the band. Mercedes shut her eyes, and waited for the intro to subside. Finally, she took a deep breath, and began to sing the song of one of her childhood idols.

"_L.A. proved too much for the man,"_ Mercedes began, with her trio of "Pipsqueaks" as she had come to call them, backing her up.  
_"So he's leavin' the life he's come to know.  
He said he's goin' back to find  
Ooh, what's left of his world,  
The world he left behind  
Not so long ago,"_ Rachel's heart stopped. She had never truly listened to the words of the song because she was always so awestruck by Mercedes' stellar performance, but as the words permeated her soul, she found herself fighting back tears to the cold, shocking reminder of her own life.

"_He kept dreamin'  
That someday he'd be a star.  
But he sure found out the hard way  
That dreams don't always come true.  
So he pawned all his hopes,  
and he even sold his old car.  
Bought a one way ticket  
To the life he once knew,  
Oh yes he did,"_ Mercedes crooned.

As the closing lines to "Midnight Train to Georgia," came up, the audience once again broke into great approval. Mercedes was bawling, and had beads of sweat on her forehead, but she looked so very proud.

They finished up with "Viva La Vida," tears in all of their eyes. Rachel was still feeling some pains, but she pushed them aside, far too enthralled with the performance to give any sort of care to herself or the baby at this point. They rushed off the stage, breaking into a huge hug once they made it to the dressing room.

"Guys, we've got this in the bag!" Finn exclaimed. Rachel put her hands on her hips.

"Guys, let's not get too confident," she warned, but Artie wheeled up to Puck and gave him a high five.

"Why not?" he asked, a wide smile on his face. Rachel laughed.

After what, in Rachel's opinion, was a horrendous version of "I Dreamed a Dream," and a rather unique performance of the Beatles' classic Let it Be from Boogaloo Beats and Crisp Crescendos, and what felt like a three hour wait for the judges to deliberate, a PA poked his head into the New Directions dressing room.

"We're ready for you now," he said, pushing up the microphone on his headset. The glee club stood, forming a chain of hands, save for Artie, who was pushed onstage by Mr. Schue.

"Once again, we'd like to thank everyone for coming out to this year's Sectionals Competition," the announcer said, beaming at the audience and the terrified students. "Remember, there are concessions in the lobby that will be sold up to an hour after our competition is complete, so if you kids are starving you still have a chance to grab a bite to eat!" he said brightly.

"In second place,' he began, opening an envelope. Rachel squeezed Quinn and Mercedes' hands tightly. Crisp Crescendos!" the group standing next to New Directions began screaming and hugging one another, while New Directions glanced at one another excitedly. "And in first place, winner of this year's Sectionals…well would you look at that, two years in a row…" he began, and New Directions began screaming and jumping up and down. "New Directions!"

"Oh my god!" Mercedes shouted. Finn grabbed Rachel's hand and they raced to pick up the trophy just as they had the year before, then began passing it around the circle. Finn picked Quinn up and spun her around, Santana and Brittany were crying, Kurt had kissed Sam, and Artie was holding hands with Tina. Suddenly, the blood drained from Rachel's ears, and she could hear nothing but her heartbeat.

Drip.

Drip.

Pain.

She sucked in a sharp breath, looking towards her teammates, none who were paying attention to the brunette. Everything moved in slow motion, and she looked back towards the floor.

Drip.

Drip.

Drip.

Pain.

"Guys?" she said quietly, looking up as she watched Finn hug his soon to be stepbrother Kurt tightly, and Quinn wrap her arms around Tina and Mercedes.

"Guys?" she said, barely audible.

Artie had wheeled to Mr. Schue and was giving him a high five. Matt had the trophy high above his head, and Mike and Puck were doing a complex high five. Her breath was heavy, and she could feel the beads of sweat on the back of her neck.

"Guys," she said once again, loud enough for Mike to hear her this time.

"Guys, Rachel need something," he said, elbowing Finn.

"Rachel what's…." he began. Suddenly, the club saw the pool of water at Rachel's feet, and the terrified expression on the teenager's face.

"Guys….this is it."


	19. Old Friends

1:47 PM. Los Angeles, California

Jesse sat outside of a stuffy theatre, waiting for his name to be called for rehearsal. He was performing in a Musical Theatre exhibition with several other college students from the Los Angeles area, and had never felt so low. True, he was good, but so was every other student performing in such a cabaret. He watched as a skinny, blonde girl lit up a cigarette on the curb next to him, and she wordlessly handed the pack to him.

"Oh, no thank you," he said, looking away quickly. Why would he ever ingest such a toxic substance, allow it to destroy his vocal chords in a way that would be unrepairable? He watched the cars fly by on the highway over the hill, and imagined what it would be like to get in one and just go. He hadn't driven his car in months solely because of the insanity of Los Angeles traffic, and often found himself missing the feeling of wind in his hair, jams on the stereo.

"Paula?" a stagehand said as he pushed open the heavy metal doors. The blonde stood, dropping her freshly lit cigarette and smashing it with a high heeled toe.

"That's me," the blonde said, walking in the door.

"St. James, you're on standby," the stagehand said to him. Jesse nodded appreciatively and turned back to the highway as he heard the metal door slam.

"Just where I thought you'd be," said a voice behind him. Shocked, Jesse stood, face to face with Andrea Cohen.

"What the hell are you doing here?" he asked in shock.

"I heard you were doing a showcase, so I thought I'd stop by," she smiled. Jesse raised an eyebrow.

"You live in Ohio," he frowned.

"I like to take trips every now and again," she shrugged. "Sit down, sit down," she said, nodding to the curb. "I wanna talk to you." Jesse followed her orders, looking skeptically at the girl he hadn't seriously spoken to for about a year. "How are things?" she asked. He shrugged.

"Best as can be expected. I'm not used to being average," he said, nodding towards the theatre, where Paula's belt could be heard even through the thick concrete and the metal doors. Andrea laughed.

"The truth sucks, doesn't it?" Jesse grinned and looked back towards the road of the alley. "Jesse, there's something I wanted to talk to you about," Andrea took a deep breath, "Or really, someone," she added. Jesse licked his lips and looked at his former dance partner. "She was telling you the truth, Jesse," Andrea said, looking him in the eyes. In an instant, he knew exactly who she was talking about, and his heart sank.

"How do you know her?" he questioned, but Andrea shook her head.

"She told me everything," she explained. "How you broke her heart—"

"I had to, Andi!" he said, looking deep into the girl's eyes. "You know how they are, probably better than any of us. If I didn't do what they wanted I would have been off the team, and…"

"And what? Would that have been so terrible? I survived! I had to make my choice, Jesse. Something I loved or something that yeah, would have sucked to go without for a while, but I would have gotten over it. I know you, Jesse St. James. You will _never _get over her," Andrea shook her head, "no matter what you say." Jesse closed his eyes and ran a hand through his hair.

"Andrea, I can't deal with this now. I have a career, I have a life to worry about."

"And you have a child," Andrea pointed out. Jesse stood, shaking his head.

"No. I don't," he hissed. "I'm living out my dreams now, Andrea. I can't go back." Andrea stood on the curb to be at his eye level, but just as she was about to hit him with a hard blow, the door opened.

"St. James, you're up," the stagehand said. Jesse nodded.

"I have to go," he said to Andrea, holding open the heavy door. She shook her head.

"Jesse…" she warned, but ignored her, walking into the theatre. She pulled open the door and followed him. "Jesse," she said again, more firmly this time. He spun around.

"What, Andrea. What else could you possibly have to say to me?" he asked irritably.

"Do you really think that becoming a huge star is gonna make the hurting go away?" she asked. Jesse looked at her, but was pulled away by the stagehand.

"We're waiting!" he hissed.

Jesse walked out on the stage, blinded by bright lights. He caught the eye of his piano player and nodded, assuring her he was ready. A soft, light melody began to play, and Jesse looked out into the audience, defiant.

"_Nothing's gonna harm you, not while I'm around.  
Nothing's gonna harm you, no sir, not while I'm around.  
Demons are prowling everywhere, nowadays.  
I'll send 'em howling,  
I don't care, I've got ways,"_ he sang. He could feel the chills running up his arms, but he pushed through.

"_No one's gonna hurt you,  
No one's gonna dare.  
Others may desert you,  
Not to worry, whistle, I'll be there,"_ he could feel hot tears starting to spring from the corners of his eyes, but he swallowed, sitting down on the stool that Paula had been using.

"_Demons'll charm you with a smile, for a while,  
But in time...  
Nothing can harm you,  
Not while I'm around..."_ the piano played a long instrumental, during which he put his hand to his forehead and looked at the stage. When he felt his part coming back up, he sang once again, his voice cracked and shaky.

"_No one's gonna hurt you, no one's gonna dare  
Others may desert you,  
Not to worry, whistle, I'll be there!  
Demons'll charm you with a smile, for a while  
But in time..."_ he sang the note high, and his voice broke with tears.

"Nothing can harm you  
Not while I'm around..."

6:02PM, Lima General Hospital, Lima, Ohio

"Breathe Rachel! It's going to be okay!" Finn assured her as the glee club rushed Rachel into the hospital, plopping her into the nearest wheelchair and rushing to the maternity ward.

"My best friend is having her baby!" Quinn said breathlessly to a nurse as they made it to the ward.

"Okay well hold the phone, you can't all come in at once!" the nurse said to the panicked children.

"Quinn and Mercedes!" Rachel yelled, grabbing both of them by the hand. The nurse nodded and took the girls to the delivery room, while the rest of the Glee club took over the waiting room. Matt was even still holding the trophy because they had come directly from the bus. Finn stared at the doors, watching after his best friend, furious that she was still all alone. Despite everything, despite the fact that she had found friends through the Glee club, he knew nothing would compare to having the father of her baby in the room with her.

6:17 PM, Los Angeles, California

Jesse stood impatiently offstage, dressed in a tux shirt, tie, and dress pants. He had already given his best to the rest of the performers, warmed up his voice, and had a bottle of water to settle his nerves. So what was this terrible, nervous feeling he felt in the pit of his stomach?

"Break of Leg," he said to Paula as she exited to the stage. He watched from the wings as she took her spot on the stool, wearing an elegant green gown. She looked far different from the chain smoking blonde he had seen mere hours before. He was barely paying attention to her performance, when he looked up in awe, thunderstruck by the words of her showtune.

"_Think of me, think of me fondly,  
When we've said goodbye.  
Remember me once in a while -  
Please promise me you'll try.  
When you find that, once again, you long  
To take your heart back and be free -  
If you ever find a moment,  
Spare a thought for me," _ at any other moment in his live, Jesse would have marveled at how such a magnificent voice could come out a creature who put such a disgusting substance into her body. But at this very moment, Jesse's mind resided only in one place—with Rachel Berry. Rachel Berry, who was having his child. Rachel Berry, who had given up everything to love him, and he had just shoved it in her face. Rachel Berry, who had made his heart pound when he was walking back to his apartment from class and he had received a phone call; how just the tiny squeak of his name had made all the feelings rush back. Rachel Berry, who needed him.

"_Flowers fade,  
The fruits of summer fade.  
They have their seasons, so do we  
But please promise me, that sometimes  
You will think of me."_

Jesse turned quickly, heading for the stage door.

"St. James, what are you doing? You're on!" the stagehand asked irritably. Jesse shook his head.

"I have to go," he said. The stagehand grabbed his arm.

"What are you talking about?" he spat. Jesse pulled his arm free, and continued to walk towards the door.

"I just had a baby," he said, bursting through the door and out into the cold night air.


	20. Let Me Start By Saying I Love You

Rachel Berry stood at the thick glass window, watching her daughter smiling away. Daughter, yes, it had been a girl. Born at 9:24PM, after what felt like hours and hours of pushing. Her beautiful, 7 and a half-pound daughter was finally here. Rachel touched the windowpane. It had only been a few hours since she had held her, but Rachel was becoming restless for her daughter already. She heard someone approach behind her, but said nothing, eyes fixated on her daughter, or "Baby Berry," as the name card read.

"We do some good work," the voice said, startling Rachel. She looked up to find Jesse, and she quickly backed away from him, confused. This was some sort of dream, but it seemed so real. Maybe the pain relievers were still working, that was the only way to explain such a hallucination. He reached out and pushed a stray strand of hair behind her ear, and Rachel's breath shuddered—this was no dream.

"Hi," he said, smiling.

"Hi," she replied, breathless. He looked back towards the baby. "It's a girl," said Rachel, unable to think of anything else to say. Jesse laughed.

"I see that. Does she have a name?" Rachel shook her head.

"No. I couldn't think of one," she said honestly. Jesse reached for Rachel's hands.

"Rachel, I'm so sorry," he said. "I was so stupid," he admitted. Rachel's heart was pounding. Here it was, the one thing she had desired since the last time she saw those eyes on a foreign stage somewhere in Indiana. "I feel bad about what happened," he whispered, pulling her close to him. Rachel broke down, tears pouring down her cheeks. He tried to wipe them away, but she was too quick for him.

"I thought you'd never come back," Rachel cried into his chest. He laughed, a few tears of his own spilling onto her shiny brown hair. He lifted her chin to look in his eyes.

"And miss all this?" he said, nodding towards their baby girl. "You mean everything to me, Rachel Berry," he kissed her forehead. "You and this baby. This is what I want," he smiled, wiping her tears with his thumb. "I just didn't know it until you showed me what it was like to be madly in love with someone," Jesse looked down at her, and Rachel wrapped her arms around him, kissing him with everything, all the passion she had felt for the last eight and a half months. All the hurt, all the hate, all the feelings that had accumulated in his absence, they were pouring out. She held him close, afraid to let go, afraid that he would disappear.

"I love you," Jesse whispered. Rachel hiccupped.

"I love you too," she could barely breathe. The stood there for what felt like hours, before a familiar tune echoed from a radio at the nurse's station. Jesse took her hand leading her closer to the music, and there, alone in the dimly lit hospital hallway, they danced.

'_Hello, is it me you're looking for,"_ he sang in her ear. They stood for a long time, Rachel pressed close against him, his head resting on hers. Finally, she looked up to see Shelby leaning against the glass, staring at the babies. Rachel looked up at Jesse, who appeared just as surprised as she was.

"Mom?" Rachel asked as she approached the woman. Shelby was beaming.

"Oh baby," she said, her eyes glossy with tears. "Congratulations, both of you." Shelby turned to look back at the baby. "Does she have a name?" Rachel began to shake her head, but Jesse took Rachel's hand and nodded.

"Melody," he said, kissing the back of Rachel's hand. Rachel looked at him, smiling from ear to ear, and then turned back to Shelby.

"Melody Maria St. James," she added. The three generations of Corcoran-Berry-St. James girls stood, forming a perfect triangle, while Jesse stayed behind Rachel, hands on her shoulders.

"It's beautiful," Shelby smiled. "She looks like you," she added. Rachel shook her head, and wrapped her arms around the woman.

"No. She looks like us."


End file.
